John Mulaney: New in Town - Ice-T on "SVU" & Old Murder Investigations

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  • Published on Mar 3, 2018
  • John Mulaney isn't sure why Ice-T is always shocked in every episode of "Law & Order: SVU" after 11 years of working in the sex crimes department.
    Watch full stand-up specials now -- no login required: www.cc.com/shows/stand-up-library
    Watch more from New in Town: www.cc.com/episodes/iku0l8/stand-up-specials-john-mulaney--new-in-town-season-1-ep-101
  • ComedyComedy

Comments • 549

  • Mr Barefoot
    Mr Barefoot 15 hours ago

    Balling.

  • Tuft D.
    Tuft D. 4 days ago +1

    You mean like when someoneee has too many cats?
    Or like when someoneee chews too much tobacco?
    Or like when someoneee plays too much poker?
    Or like when someoneee goes to the bar too much?
    Or like when someoneee watches to much TV?
    Or like when someoneee wastes too much paper?
    Or like when someoneee vapes too much?
    Or like when someoneee watches too much Law & Order SUV Unit?
    Or like when someoneee takes too many medicines?
    Or like when someoneee *listens to too much John Mulaney aka me*

  • Gaby C
    Gaby C 4 days ago

    “Hmmm gross! Mop it up!” Lol my sister and I say that all the time.

  • zimbraben
    zimbraben 5 days ago

    Ice T - great in SVU and that insurance commercial...

  • Rob Eddy
    Rob Eddy 7 days ago

    Some people sell their soul to be a comedian.

  • Nice hat, hot dog!
    Nice hat, hot dog! 7 days ago

    I love John so much but god does he sound like onision

  • ptproc
    ptproc 7 days ago

    Awesome...laughed to 😭

  • Horny Kouta
    Horny Kouta 8 days ago

    I"M GONNA CUM

  • Gĺø Rìâ
    Gĺø Rìâ 11 days ago

    He looks like dua lipa

  • mary tommy
    mary tommy 11 days ago

    love him so much

  • Cloud Songon
    Cloud Songon 11 days ago

    Lmmfao!

  • Rory Scottish
    Rory Scottish 12 days ago

    This guy gives me the creeps . Keep him away from ladies. Lol

  • m love29
    m love29 14 days ago +1

    He sounds like Nathan lane. I just realized this

  • Olivia Boyette
    Olivia Boyette 15 days ago

    😂

  • gmunden1
    gmunden1 15 days ago

    I'm choking from laughing so much.

  • TraumaER
    TraumaER 15 days ago +6

    He reminds me of Seinfeld.
    Super funny without needing to cuss or be racist throughout a stand up routine.
    👍

  • Arleen Lopez
    Arleen Lopez 15 days ago

    Such a sexy specimen!!

  • Ghost Fishies
    Ghost Fishies 16 days ago +1

    I’d literally bet big money that this guy couldn’t make me laugh... so unbelievably unfunny.

  • Paul Mansfield
    Paul Mansfield 17 days ago +1

    He stole the whole Ice-T bad actor joke from Mike Epps. Still funny though.

  • Jose Chavez
    Jose Chavez 17 days ago +1

    "You're gonna have to get used to that..."

  • Elke Eilers
    Elke Eilers 17 days ago +1

    Who wouldn´t want to marry him? ♡ So cute

  • Sara Cabello
    Sara Cabello 18 days ago +1

    He's ripping off Tom Segura's midget routine completely.

    • French Toast77
      French Toast77 16 days ago

      Sara Cabello no he is not . It’s not the same at all🙄

  • Maria Elizabeth McCray
    Maria Elizabeth McCray 19 days ago +1

    “We’ll draw chalk around where the body is... that way they know where it was...” 😂😂😂😂

  • Quinnharley 4567
    Quinnharley 4567 19 days ago

    Hey! That's Andrew from Big Mouth!

  • burymeinpink
    burymeinpink 19 days ago

    So turns out Ice-T ACTUALLY SAYS "bets the house on the ponies" on SVU

  • Pablo Vargas
    Pablo Vargas 19 days ago

    His voice alone is funny

  • ghostymira
    ghostymira 22 days ago

    at the end when he's talking about the bank robbery he reminded me sooo much of eric forman

  • country city
    country city 25 days ago +1

    (duct tape) over ur boring yawn 😴 mouth is the only thing that will help with a career in (real) comedy -👍🏼 sit down bozo 🤡 this is (black top's) stage - word - 👍🏼

  • NeverTrippin
    NeverTrippin 26 days ago

    2:25 HACHIKUJIIIII

  • Somsupi
    Somsupi 26 days ago +1

    big?? mouth??

  • Janet Muller
    Janet Muller 28 days ago

    John is one of the funniest comedians I have heard in the last 7 1/2 years. And the best part is he doesn’t have to cuss he doesn’t have to put anybody down he doesn’t have to be disgusting and revolting he is a true comedian.

  • Jurgen Klopp
    Jurgen Klopp 29 days ago +2

    He sounds like Andrew Glouberman

  • Astrological- Aliens
    Astrological- Aliens 29 days ago

    Looks like the victim had anal contusions

  • Matthew
    Matthew Month ago

    He should do a bit on what the flash would do trying to be a standup comedian.

  • roger peet
    roger peet Month ago

    I swear this dude cracks me up something fierce

  • Malleta X
    Malleta X Month ago

    You should come to british tv - you can swear after 9 (most words you can although things like c**t and the n word are still not allowed)

  • Chandler Reagh
    Chandler Reagh Month ago

    First off, no

  • Chelsea Hollenquest

    If you close your eyes he kind of sounds like Zach braff

  • jm2204355
    jm2204355 Month ago

    where's the funny part

  • Cheerio Dreemmur
    Cheerio Dreemmur Month ago

    I was just watching the episode about the sex addicts too

  • Greta Garbolini
    Greta Garbolini Month ago

    He is a treasure.

  • SERN
    SERN Month ago +1

    _"Hmmm, gross. Mop it up!"_
    I'm trying to sleep, and I'm just bursting out laughing in the middle of the night.

  • Mikey'sAunt zulu
    Mikey'sAunt zulu Month ago

    he reminds me of Grant gustin..

  • Cydney Jones
    Cydney Jones Month ago

    I’ve watched this probably 50 times and I still laugh 😂😂

  • Rj Chavers
    Rj Chavers Month ago

    Love John and Ice To too 😂

  • Young Man
    Young Man Month ago

    Does anyone else find it hilarious that Ice T, a rapper who once wrote a song called “Cop Killer,” now plays a police detective on TV?

  • Victor Matautia
    Victor Matautia Month ago

    I only see Spider Ham when he speaks... Am I ok?

  • Hazy J
    Hazy J Month ago

    That Ice T impression is mad accurate 😂

  • Haddasa
    Haddasa Month ago

    He has this strange hotness to him☺️

  • Rome O
    Rome O Month ago

    ice t : cops found homicide 2 kids shot still don't know what happened 😂😂😂

  • Midwest DankAlumni
    Midwest DankAlumni Month ago +1

    S2 e12 it's T and munch interviewing a shrink. Not detectives teaching him.
    I'm watching it now, that scene just came on and I had to pull this up

  • nina lopez
    nina lopez Month ago +1

    ALL I CAN HEAR IS ANDREW WLRHDKWB

  • STH
    STH Month ago

    They turned Spider-Ham into a person??? Crazy.

  • OneironauticalOne
    OneironauticalOne Month ago

    This thing is not comedy. Sorry, its dull drone does not have timing or sincerity. God help future comedy fans if this thing becomes a benchmark.

  • arrvjay11
    arrvjay11 Month ago

    Why is he so damn gorgeous

  • galactibabe
    galactibabe Month ago

    *these are their stories*

  • 212brawler
    212brawler Month ago +1

    Picturing spider ham talking after watching spiderverse

  • sharksandsheep
    sharksandsheep Month ago +11

    One line that never gets enough recognition is "scratchy lotteries." The simple brilliance of that phrase is incredible. I had to pause and laugh the first time I heard it.

  • Angel Almanza
    Angel Almanza Month ago +1

    Finally, a stand up comic with a special that is actually funny!!!

  • Terrence Harris-Hughes

    They need to put Ice T on Big Mouth

  • Terrence Harris-Hughes

    Your telling me this guy gets paid for telling jokes
    Yeah Ice he's a comedian and he's doing a stand up routine

  • anime lover
    anime lover Month ago +1

    R u the kid from big mouth???

  • Fishymonster
    Fishymonster Month ago

    He Talks Like He Capitalizes Every Word (Didn’t Steal This From Tumblr)

  • Watashi Wa Noodle
    Watashi Wa Noodle Month ago

    I'm a white man's whore for John

  • Che1424
    Che1424 Month ago

    Not funny

  • Jenna Winchester
    Jenna Winchester Month ago +1

    “HAHAHA LOOK AT HIS FEMININE HIPS!!!”


    “NO THATS SOMETHING IM SENSITIVE ABOUT!!!”

  • TheGirl
    TheGirl Month ago +1

    3:33 😅

  • SheriffDawson1
    SheriffDawson1 2 months ago

    So who coined the midget "n" word joke?

  • DOES NOT COMPUTE
    DOES NOT COMPUTE 2 months ago

    The new F word: EFF AHH DOUBLE GEE OHH TEE

  • Callum Boyle
    Callum Boyle 2 months ago +1

    tall child.

  • Jordacar
    Jordacar 2 months ago

    For some reason I pictured Michael Shannon playing that 1935 detective.
    “We’ll draw chalk around where the body is. That way we’ll know where it was.”

  • Ryan Newman
    Ryan Newman 2 months ago

    All I hear is Spider-Ham.

  • Nia Turner
    Nia Turner 2 months ago

    His voice is so nerdy compared to how he looks.

  • dequan spruill
    dequan spruill 2 months ago

    Came here because of jay pharoah

  • Will Hoon For Food
    Will Hoon For Food 2 months ago

    The irony of the Law and Order director being an actual pedophile.

  • Yin Crowspike MSP
    Yin Crowspike MSP 2 months ago

    It's 12:28 I'm so loopy. I'm going to wake up my brother from laughing so hard.

  • Learningle
    Learningle 2 months ago

    the episode is season 2 ep 12
    It's toward the middle about 22 minutes in

  • Dallas Walker
    Dallas Walker 2 months ago +4

    Look at that high waisted man. Those are some feminine hips.

  • Hawk3
    Hawk3 2 months ago

    Am I the only one who hears Spider-Ham from Into the spider verse

  • Adam
    Adam 2 months ago

    N1359 US41

  • not_luivuitton
    not_luivuitton 2 months ago

    "Midget is as bad as the n-word."

  • Hamilton ate my soul
    Hamilton ate my soul 2 months ago

    im gonna say the n word

  • Balto Patrick
    Balto Patrick 2 months ago

    .

  • Terrence Harris-Hughes
    Terrence Harris-Hughes 2 months ago +2

    His Ice T is amazing

  • Irrelevant Elephant
    Irrelevant Elephant 2 months ago +7

    First off:
    *no*

  • Neptune
    Neptune 2 months ago

    My uncle talked about this a lot and it’s super funny also love your work in spider verse - A 12 year old sleep deprived and likes spider verse

  • KK Akuoku
    KK Akuoku 2 months ago

    John Mulaney- looks like a Kennedy Family offspring, yet sounds like a 14-year old boy impersonating a 1970s sportscaster.

  • Sub Bot
    Sub Bot 2 months ago +3

    DREW!!!!!?????

  • Anakin Skywalker
    Anakin Skywalker 2 months ago +2

    hehehehhehe tell them it was golden joe and suggins gang *Heheheheheehehehehhehehe*

  • bigtaz504
    bigtaz504 2 months ago

    Ok now this white boy funny.

  • FilledToTheBrim
    FilledToTheBrim 2 months ago

    It just went from comparing the word midget to the n word to bank robberies

  • delaney
    delaney 2 months ago +1

    *mmm......* *_g r o s s_*

  • Tekte234
    Tekte234 2 months ago +8

    He should have been Peter Parker. but he's Peter Porker.

  • Fandom Smoothie
    Fandom Smoothie 2 months ago +70

    He sounds like Andrew from Big Mouth
    Edit: Aaaaand he voices Andrew from Big Mouth-

    • Pastels Paradox
      Pastels Paradox 26 days ago

      OH MY GOD I HAD NO IDEA??

    • Hime Anji
      Hime Anji Month ago +1

      Fandom Smoothie
      You didn’t have to edit that in...let the youtubers hate on you for saying that 😂😂😂

  • Kevyn The DevylMan
    Kevyn The DevylMan 2 months ago

    Him playing Spider-Ham is the best gift to my imagination, listening to this.

  • new greys luv
    new greys luv 2 months ago +1

    mmmmm... Gross! Mop it up

  • ThanossGaming
    ThanossGaming 2 months ago

    2:40 Finally someone said it! I couldn't have said it better. Ice-T's character should not be so surprised anymore, he should be jaded. Thank you Spider-Ham! mY HERO!

  • Lucía 2792
    Lucía 2792 2 months ago

    Ok but what's the n-word?

  • Myles C
    Myles C 2 months ago

    I just washed my hands that why their wet no other reason

  • Mason Pines
    Mason Pines 2 months ago

    JM is a national treasure.