TF2 Maps (Actual Size)

  • Published on Apr 5, 2018
  • Maps, maps, we are the maps. Celebrateanadabada birthday bash.
    Basically, this is a half story-time, half Fun Fact video about the size of TF2 maps (or at least the size that actually matters). I tried to make the subject as interesting to watch as I thought it was to research. Hope you enjoy. And yes, there are more videos coming soon regarding the most recent Blue Moon update. This is a video I was working on before the patch dropped last week.
    (04/06/2018) Updated the size of Enclosure from 48.446 to 41.0497. Pazer discovered that the nav flood had extended into an inaccessible area by accident. Still the biggest map, but not by as much as previously thought.
    (04/07/2018) The conversion rates from kHu² to real life measurements are incorrect; here is a list of every map, along with their averages in km² (data provided by @the_link_crafte on Twitter):
    Here’s the full data:
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Comments • 2 623

  • Uncle Dane
    Uncle Dane  11 months ago +2175

    Before you ask, yes I'm going to be making a video about the Short Circuit since it was updated last week to be a freakin Mega Man gun. Uploading that video will take some time since I'm waiting on a few possible bug fixes and generally just getting a good feel for how to use it effectively, so thanks for your patience. Hopefully this video holds ya'll over in the meantime. :)

    • Syndrome Sydney mulraine
      Syndrome Sydney mulraine 4 months ago

      ...i feel bad for ya

    • 07kilswitch
      07kilswitch 4 months ago

      Man this has to much dick refrences in it "just because its long doesnt mean its big" "lets mesgure thier actual size" i honestly think some girls where giggling this whole video haha

    • Cameron Bunn
      Cameron Bunn 7 months ago

      Uncle Dane hi I was wondering if you could send a friend request to me but if you do I will send you one

    • matthew hurley
      matthew hurley 7 months ago

      Uncle Dane did you remember / count cp_cloak? (It's included with the default install of the game but isn't in valves map rotation)

    • Mikeal Krinzousky
      Mikeal Krinzousky 8 months ago


  • Mr Depressed
    Mr Depressed 4 hours ago

    is it just me or uncle looks like yogscast simon

  • mip0
    mip0 17 hours ago

    I really like your honesty, when you say things like:
    "what I would call their 'actual sizes'" (1:45) and
    "it would still be bigger than dustbowl _in_ _terms_ _of_ _playable_ _surface_ _area_ " (9:17)
    There's so much sloppiness with definitions, and some people even use it for deception. Liked and subscribed!
    Also, how about this measure: The minimum number of characters (or cameras) you would need to place for every playable-area-pixel to be in line-of-sight of at least one of them.
    E.g. for a square map with an empty single room building in the middle, you would need three: Two at opposing corners of the house, and one inside. This could to some extent solve the problem of big open useless spaces making a map bigger.
    A computationally heavy brute force way of doing it would be to put stationary enemies everywhere, and see how many sentries you would need to put down to hit all of them. Where enemies everywhere would mean, say, one per square Hu, on a uniform grid. Obviously there must be a better way of doing it that doesn't use the game but works with the map files directly, I just wanted to be constructive.

  • JC Stone
    JC Stone 22 hours ago

    Can someone kick the Uncle Dane wannabe

  • jumpydoo 5 0
    jumpydoo 5 0 Day ago

    What a sassy thumbnail​

  • Jason Keats
    Jason Keats Day ago

    i wonder how big higher tower is

  • Luke Pankratz
    Luke Pankratz 4 days ago

    2 fort is the biggest map- change my mind

  • KiwiKidGamer 49
    KiwiKidGamer 49 6 days ago

    1:28 lol I completely forgot this section exsisted

  • some guy
    some guy 8 days ago

    what about koth_cloak ?

  • Joseph Bissett
    Joseph Bissett 8 days ago

    I would guess payload maps feel bigger than they are not because of long narrow corridors, but because of how slowly the game moves through them. Payload carts are pretty sluggish, and you have to stay near it to win, so even though the actual distance it travels is pretty short, it takes a whole game to traverse it.

  • Elias Johnson
    Elias Johnson 9 days ago

    Well is also the best CTF map and of the best maps in general

  • PotatoMcWhiskey
    PotatoMcWhiskey 10 days ago +1

    Am I crazy or did this man do very little of the actual work to obtain this knowledge 🤔

  • MrNasa
    MrNasa 11 days ago

    And I dont mean T H I C C like how im T H I C C

  • jjprs 306
    jjprs 306 13 days ago

    Uncle Dane is literally just a tf2 matpat/austin

  • Mattman
    Mattman 14 days ago

    tfw Hydro still exists

  • Nightfury Matthew
    Nightfury Matthew 15 days ago

    Anyone ever wanted a turret that could fire from any range, well, now you can! Introducing tiny maps! All the players spawn beside each other and there's no need for skill or competitiveness! What if I fall? You'll die of course! Welcome to team fortress 2!

  • Un-Known Mapping
    Un-Known Mapping 16 days ago

    Ya know , TF2 will never die

  • Pudim
    Pudim 20 days ago +1

    Steel Sucks!

  • TheChocoKing will eventually be gaming

    I kinda want to know how big highertower is

  • I like sweets
    I like sweets 22 days ago +1


  • Zach Guth
    Zach Guth 24 days ago

    to put an Real Life scale of things, the KOTH map Viaduct is 100 times bigger than a standard NHL hockey rink (Acourding to my calculation).

  • Vemomat !!
    Vemomat !! 26 days ago +1

    Size doesn't matter.
    It's about playability

  • Quite A Cool Cat
    Quite A Cool Cat 28 days ago

    What the frick is a hammer unit

    BLITZN00DLE 29 days ago

    hydro thicc

  • LuvSeals
    LuvSeals Month ago

    “Dust balls” in caption

  • Ghost Rider04
    Ghost Rider04 Month ago


  • Miles Williams-Lewis

    Lots of phallic imagery when you use synonyms to the word "large".

  • DragonStrike
    DragonStrike Month ago

    This video is just pointless lmao.. If you could tell that the NAT files where not gonna work because of how big the maps where just shows that this video is pointless because you can just tell which is the biggest and which is the smallest map lol but whatever I guess it's just unique content for a TF2 TVclipr I guess lol..

  • DragonStrike
    DragonStrike Month ago

    Oh so that's what Uncle Dane looks like, I thought he had a white beard, sunglasses and a white hat..
    I also thought that you meant the maps actual size due to the thumbnail that they were the small version of every map under the actual map buried and just resized so it's big enough for players to have a fair and decent battle on.. Lol idk if anyone else understands what I'm talking about but eh.. Some might but that's just what I thought the video was about just based off the thumbnail.. Idk

  • Izzkka
    Izzkka Month ago

    Globglogabgalab soundtrack?

  • Memes 4 life
    Memes 4 life Month ago


  • Rory Weiler
    Rory Weiler Month ago

    7:33 Lol!

  • lesley galvin
    lesley galvin Month ago

    *M A S S I V E M A P S*

  • Kwint
    Kwint Month ago

    the way u calculated it, it's not right, see, the side of little hills that u can jump against and then slip off again also count if u calculate it like that, take for example harvest, the little hill on which the shed is with the medium healthpack, the sides of that hill will count too, but you're technically not supposed to run on that.

  • Connor Thompson
    Connor Thompson Month ago

    What surprised me was how small CP_steel is. I guess that shows the effective use of space when designing that map.

  • Tume
    Tume Month ago

    now Vsauce is on my recommandations

  • Jouva Moufette
    Jouva Moufette Month ago

    1122 square feet? That's like... 33 1/2 feet by 33 1/2 feet on average. That's TINY.
    ...we're tiny

  • C4ptianmcd3rp
    C4ptianmcd3rp Month ago

    *mr sandman tune*

    M r m a p s i z e

  • G7X7X
    G7X7X Month ago

    Whats the smal inteligence map?

  • Yousor0
    Yousor0 Month ago

    3kliksphilip would’ve done this in about 1 day 😂😂

  • Smudge SMJ
    Smudge SMJ Month ago

    i dont even play this game, i watched the whole thing


  • Justa_ Randomguy
    Justa_ Randomguy Month ago +1

    GET PAST MY SENTERY BOI!!! (Finde it mate)

  • Spiro Gamer
    Spiro Gamer Month ago

    What about hydro

  • J D
    J D Month ago

    Mmmmmmm splendidly delicous!

  • Will
    Will 2 months ago

    Hydro is only 37 kHu?

  • The_EnTiTy
    The_EnTiTy 2 months ago

    6:30 Turn on Captions and read

  • Elias Rahimi
    Elias Rahimi 2 months ago

    Why is uncle Dane talking about himself being thick

  • asdf asdf
    asdf asdf 2 months ago

    higher tower? uwu

    WHOMS'T DARES 2 months ago

    Mr. World

  • BeuBacon
    BeuBacon 2 months ago +1

    nice video

  • Damian Yin
    Damian Yin 2 months ago

    I’m your enemy and your friend (spy&engineer)

  • Jaxon Morkes
    Jaxon Morkes 2 months ago

    2:04 What's he holding

  • B4nster
    B4nster 2 months ago

    *Cue the Jurassic park theme.*

  • Saphiros
    Saphiros 2 months ago

    rip tc hydro you were a core map once

  • Xwater
    Xwater 2 months ago

    upward has more detalies then bad water ( i like more bad water)

  • epic_man89
    epic_man89 2 months ago

    tc_hydro is the biggest, Before i watched the vid.

  • Op Myst
    Op Myst 2 months ago

    map is big big

  • Halvstekt
    Halvstekt 2 months ago

    Thank u duncle cane

  • Певко
    Певко 2 months ago

    is this glodglobglabgala reference

  • Kang Wang
    Kang Wang 2 months ago

    *now find the sizes of the most popular community maps*

  • agentant 78
    agentant 78 2 months ago

    I think overall itemtest might be the smallest tf2 map

  • UltraGaming 49
    UltraGaming 49 2 months ago

    *_get past my sentry boi_*

  • dragan ljubenov
    dragan ljubenov 2 months ago

    What about Cactus canyon 3 stage? that is surely massive.

  • Zane Snyder
    Zane Snyder 2 months ago

    Bro this the single most nerdy video you've ever posted

  • Neil Macneale
    Neil Macneale 2 months ago

    Get past my sentry boi

  • can u subscribe to me ?

    Mvm ?

  • KumPupp
    KumPupp 2 months ago

    EXACTLY 1.8 M

  • Tetragon 213
    Tetragon 213 2 months ago

    cp_steel is the 2nd smallest A/D map?! That just feels weird; Steel feels like such a large map when you actually play it. I wasn't expecting it to be so damn small!

  • Dead Bread
    Dead Bread 2 months ago

    The thumb nail has uncle dane have black hands

  • Victor Dennis
    Victor Dennis 2 months ago

    tfw hydro is smaller than enclosure

  • Matthew La
    Matthew La 2 months ago

    That felt like the beginning of a Vsauce video

    FRUITS И VEGETABLES 2 months ago

    ctf_2foooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooort and plr_highertower would be larger than enclosure

  • Noah Oglesby
    Noah Oglesby 2 months ago


  • Pootis Bird
    Pootis Bird 2 months ago

    Uncle Dane: The TF2 Community Showcase

  • Mining Master 06
    Mining Master 06 2 months ago

    I’m surprised that hydro is smaller then thundermountan

  • Blitz_Arena
    Blitz_Arena 3 months ago

    He is a true sentry man.

  • that1cousin
    that1cousin 3 months ago

    why didnt you use your irl wrench when you did the irl intro?

  • that1cousin
    that1cousin 3 months ago

    lol 0:52 my fav uncle is an engie in real life

  • Rainbow Gryphon
    Rainbow Gryphon 3 months ago

    That console. How do you do that.

  • cringeworthy.avi
    cringeworthy.avi 3 months ago

    she's actual size

  • Fearghus Keitz
    Fearghus Keitz 3 months ago +5

    So uncle Dane is an engineer in real life too.

  • UeUeUdk
    UeUeUdk 3 months ago

    At 0.5 speed, im on drugs

  • Lyra
    Lyra 3 months ago

    7:36 in awe at the size of this lad, absolute HAMMER UNIT

  • Core Master
    Core Master 3 months ago

    dm_mariokart map size?
    what is it

  • Edison Flanagan
    Edison Flanagan 3 months ago

    These are missing the PLR maps

  • Free To Play KING
    Free To Play KING 3 months ago

    I thought turbine was the smallest but it's junction
    I guess too much ctf keeps you away from that realisation

  • The Crab Maestro
    The Crab Maestro 3 months ago

    But with this information you can calculate the actual height of everything in the game. Someone should do this.

  • karlos lukas
    karlos lukas 3 months ago

    8:38 Trump would be proud

  • Azasen
    Azasen 3 months ago

    Don't be silly, size doesn't matter

  • May Sparkle
    May Sparkle 3 months ago

    Kind of interesting that, despite being the absolute least played map in TF2, Hydro is still the third largest map.

  • FuriousPixel
    FuriousPixel 3 months ago

    that vsauce transition tho

  • Alicia Ortega
    Alicia Ortega 3 months ago

    7:37 at 0.25 speed

  • 2E the first
    2E the first 4 months ago +1

    this video kept appearing in my recommended, so i decided to click on it and i was not disappointed

  • Cereal smug
    Cereal smug 4 months ago

    this was just pointless

  • The Saucemann
    The Saucemann 4 months ago

    after intro you start globglobgabgalab experience

  • Tristen Womack
    Tristen Womack 4 months ago

    There's also Manpower maps (Thundermountain,5gorge, Hellfire and foundry)

  • Zeghart
    Zeghart 4 months ago +1

    Jerma reference in the description

  • Cheese Wizard
    Cheese Wizard 4 months ago

    Man, you really are an engineer.

  • Nikolas Tol
    Nikolas Tol 4 months ago +2

    How is Hydro (in my mind the biggest map) smaller than Enclosure?