Why Pirates Were Nothing Like You Think - Hilarious Helmet History


Comments • 1 557

  • Vegito Blue
    Vegito Blue 2 days ago

    ARGHHHHHHH! Matey!

  • Mzikra Ayuko
    Mzikra Ayuko 6 days ago

    pirates are actually bunch of rebels againts collonialism of white people

  • nathan de crom
    nathan de crom 7 days ago

    White European Pirates "boring, bad and uncool" none White European Pirates ? "epic, good and cool" (yeah barbary pirates where epic right ?)

  • Mahatma Coat
    Mahatma Coat 7 days ago

    Well done on your Jeopardy winnings Alex !!!

  • Luke Taylor
    Luke Taylor 8 days ago

    This is a late comment, for sure, but I've got to say that despite the soundtrack for this video being a "poor man's Pirates of the Caribbean OST" I found myself enamored with it and following along by the midpoint of the video. I miss Cracked.

  • Rob Lombardo
    Rob Lombardo 10 days ago

    He's on Jeopardy right?

    • Richard Dimbo
      Richard Dimbo 9 days ago

      +metheus108 I did that same thing tonight. My baby thought I was "cute".

    • metheus108
      metheus108 10 days ago

      Yeah, blew my mind last night when I tuned in and he was returning champ. I'm shouting "I know that guy" to my wife as we watched

  • Ethan G.
    Ethan G. 11 days ago

    Anyone else get the sense this guy hates his own race?

  • Angela Bayley
    Angela Bayley 11 days ago

    Congrats on winning Jeopardy tonight, dude!

  • johnnymcblaze
    johnnymcblaze 11 days ago

    Pirates were people, so their ways were as varied as people themselves. That being said, my great great uncle henry morgan would capture a town then drag people to the defensive walls and take bets on how many times they would bounce.

  • Gesetzgebender
    Gesetzgebender 14 days ago

    So pirates history is epic if its none white? Dafuq...

  • Master Raven
    Master Raven 15 days ago

    I think it'd be interesting if you talked on the Pirates that plagued ancient Rome. The ones I believe put down by Pompey?

  • NPC// 127799
    NPC// 127799 15 days ago

    Most pirates where white Spanish, French, and English sailors and privateers who committed mutiny while on service in the Caribbeans and created pirate gangs.

  • Jigokukitsune
    Jigokukitsune 16 days ago

    Can you imagine if that island was your home "I like this island its a good place" years later
    First Hit by an Earthquake "time to repair and rebuild life gives you lemons make lemonade.
    Then hit by a tidal wave. "well that sucks surely we can try again"
    Then hit by disease "fucking hell lets build somewhere else!"

  • Grace Cochran
    Grace Cochran 19 days ago

    I think you mean Captain Jack Sparrow

  • GeBagger
    GeBagger 20 days ago

    "Why Pirates Were Nothing Like You Think"
    "Because our dominant single source for pirate stuff is kinda accurate, our concept of them is kinda accurate too"

  • madbear3512
    madbear3512 22 days ago

    So wtf your saying is that pirate's of the careabian isn't actually. Who would have guessed

  • Danielle White
    Danielle White 24 days ago


    FRISHR 25 days ago

    "Because words are hard"

  • Andrew L
    Andrew L 25 days ago

    Damn Cracked, don't you at least check Wikipedia before making educational videos?
    "It is sometimes claimed that the term derives from "Jolie Rouge" ("Pretty Red") in reference to a red flag used by French privateers. This hypothesis is considered a false etymology, as the phrase "Jolie Rouge" in reference to a pirate flag does not appear in any historical sources.[6]"

  • Koby Moore
    Koby Moore 26 days ago


  • Cloud 4shadowing
    Cloud 4shadowing 28 days ago

    2:50 *Bane voice*"Its born in the dark"🤣

  • Neil Houlton
    Neil Houlton Month ago

    You quote David Cordingly as saying some of the facts in "The General History" are true, yet in his introduction to the 1998 edition he says, "We can now go further than this and say that the majority of the facts in Johnson's History have been proved to be true. There are a few notable exceptions to this". The exceptions are the early lives of Read and Bonny, some conversations and the chapter on Captain Mission and Libertatia. Cordingly agrees that the pirates of fiction and movies are not the same the real pirates but that's because they are fiction and nobody reads or watches them for accurate or historic information, at least I hope not.

  • Lincoln Benton
    Lincoln Benton Month ago

    i miss this segment/sketch....helmet history rocks

  • 花【Night】
    花【Night】 Month ago

    The Japanese buried gold

    BOOK PILE Month ago

    When the legend becomes the fact, print the legend.

  • Abu bakr Mala
    Abu bakr Mala Month ago

    Jack sparrow was a Muslim an English pirate and crew converted to Islam , he died and buried in Tunisia

  • Jeffrey Robinson
    Jeffrey Robinson Month ago +2

    Poorly done,historical perspective lacking in an attempt to be PC👎

  • Wrongcoast13
    Wrongcoast13 Month ago

    I've heard that pirates wear a patch to flip on the night vision when attacking a ship. After being in the bright sun they would need a quick switch night vision when searching the ships for defenders. Don't eye adjust naturally to night vision as the sun goes? Plus most nights on the water could be really bright out, depending on the moon phase and weather.

  • Ed Eranged
    Ed Eranged Month ago

    Being White and a Man is implicitly bad. - Cracked.
    Glad I unsubbed a year ago.

  • Danny Pipes
    Danny Pipes Month ago

    Just assuming this isn't true like everything else on Cracked.

  • Robin Lecomte
    Robin Lecomte Month ago

    Strange education soft wound overall legitimate galaxy boundary insect person.

  • Serveck
    Serveck Month ago

    The picture he chose at 7:15 was the BRIG enterprise off the coast of MAINE, where blackbeards treasure of 4 bars of silver was actually found in the isles of shoals.

  • David Lattanzi
    David Lattanzi Month ago

    The eyepatch was for going below decks

  • Türk Poro
    Türk Poro Month ago

    So nothing about Barbarossa who is RED BEARD and was an awesome sailor

  • TommyTarkov
    TommyTarkov Month ago

    you try to be smart ma dude let me tell you a pirat hat is not a helmet. :D

  • shafeeq ishak
    shafeeq ishak Month ago

    We want more hilarious helmet history !!

  • Nicholas Chester
    Nicholas Chester Month ago

    so basically the only thing in here that i didnt know about pirate was they didn't talk like that. every thing else sounds about what people think about pirates

  • Dylan Wilson
    Dylan Wilson Month ago

    Stole this video from Sam O Nella Acadamy cracked stole it

  • blackderby80
    blackderby80 Month ago

    'Under the black flag' is an amazing book!

  • ahsan ali mughal
    ahsan ali mughal Month ago

    One piece is all about pirates it's a great show if you wanna know more about

  • T S
    T S Month ago

    1:24 that 'joke accent,' the West Country accent, was actually spoken all over Southern England at one point. It was during the Industrial Revolution that the non-rhotic British accent became prominent.

  • Dylan leaman
    Dylan leaman Month ago

    Man this channel sure loves to push its lefty agenda

    NOT SO PRO GAMING Month ago

    often led by women... hah
    on occasion*

  • Nick Deboni
    Nick Deboni Month ago

    That's disappointing... I WISH I HAVEN'T SEEN THIS VIDEO!

  • Zan bel
    Zan bel Month ago

    you are just talking about 16th century caribean pirates.
    Here in the mediterranean they roamed centuries before that

  • Boa Boy
    Boa Boy Month ago

    What's a pirate's favorite restaurant???Arrrrrrrbys🤣

  • Avid Fan
    Avid Fan Month ago +2

    What a cringe inducing self loathing smarmy feminised soy boy.

  • Connor Blackmon
    Connor Blackmon Month ago

    why does this white guy feel like he needs to throw shade towards white people on every video to please his audience?

  • Shantorey Wilkins
    Shantorey Wilkins Month ago


  • Tendo Boom
    Tendo Boom Month ago

    what about non European pirates?

  • Robert Martin
    Robert Martin Month ago

    tl;dw: The pirates you thought were so awesome as a kid were a blip on the map, and everybody was an asshole, pirates and the Royal Navy included, except the RN was even even larger asshole than you think.

  • GUNmiller2
    GUNmiller2 Month ago

    Go watch Black Sails

  • Destraex Destraex
    Destraex Destraex Month ago

    Please do an entire episode on the barbary pirates. Were they part of the huge islamic world slave trade from Africa?

  • TheMKUProject
    TheMKUProject Month ago

    So when you said this was your last episode, was that a joke or did you expect Cracked to axe the video division?

  • Daniel Mould
    Daniel Mould 2 months ago

    Okay, impressment by the British was during the napoleonic wars, Nassau was also a lawless town, and many escaped slaves were pirates as well.

  • Rory Thomson-Ball
    Rory Thomson-Ball 2 months ago

    A segment about how the history of Caribbean piracy has been over simplified and distorted... That presents an over simplified and distorted picture of pirates from that era..

  • Mateo Bovoso
    Mateo Bovoso 2 months ago

    Crack is 1000% WRONG.

  • Mateo Bovoso
    Mateo Bovoso 2 months ago

    Cracked hates the past it seems

  • BlueBig22
    BlueBig22 2 months ago

    It’s impressive how much wrong information was given here too, it was almost as bad as Pirates of the Caribbean... almost 😂

  • Savaged
    Savaged 2 months ago +3

    So. Much. Soy.
    So. Much. Self. Hatred.
    So. Much. Embarrassment.
    Europeans are awesome.

  • DevilsPride666
    DevilsPride666 2 months ago

    I'm pretty sure this guy hates white people

  • Edmund Pollock
    Edmund Pollock 2 months ago

    Eye patches are for going below decks where it is dark in the day time.

  • shino88
    shino88 2 months ago

    Cracked staff must be swimming in pussy if this Adonis is anything to go by....

  • Ian Curran
    Ian Curran 2 months ago

    Why do you gotta ruin all the movies I like, this channel is like one big buzz kill

  • moritz ashe
    moritz ashe 2 months ago

    U can not tell all that stuff u so confident proclaim as lie true nor false. What makes u so sure. Documentation wasnt that advanced then. Feels like u just wanna destroy childrens dreams because uself cant really feel euphoria alot. Sort of a hater thing. Get a life bro

  • Deni Ytb
    Deni Ytb 2 months ago +2

    the pseudo intellectual obnoxiousness displayed makes these tough to watch

  • Problem 4You
    Problem 4You 2 months ago

    Why does Cracked videos, have dislikes?

  • Cymes
    Cymes 2 months ago

    2:51 The Bane Impression was spot on.

  • Amir Chibane
    Amir Chibane 2 months ago

    Would love an episode about the berberic pirates in the mediterranean

  • ilyas hoti
    ilyas hoti 2 months ago

    How about illyrian pirates

  • Kees Kaas
    Kees Kaas 2 months ago

    First video I watched on this channel.
    Also the last. You're horribly annoying.

  • MTGGeeksGaming
    MTGGeeksGaming 2 months ago

    Is it assholish to consider slaves as cargo if literally the entire rest of the world did?

  • Edd Grs
    Edd Grs 2 months ago

    I want to see the Chinese and Japanese pirate movies. But they all must speak with the official pirate English accent.

  • David Malleous
    David Malleous 2 months ago

    What a soyboy. And I say that in sadness, not disgust. Macaulay Culkin could give him a testosterone injection. The soldiers who stormed Normandy in WWII and are 90 years old now have higher masculinity indicators. And the PC/self hate. Plus he lectures us that "white European pirates" were a vanishingly small percentage of pirates, you white chauvanists you, then goes on to lecture 100% about white European pirates. But he lectured us about our racial insensitivity so he is virtuous--aren't you impressed by how sensitive he is?

  • anime fan
    anime fan 2 months ago

    Do you know anything about gays and lesbians in the military or Army histories

  • Blackdraq
    Blackdraq 2 months ago

    Just wanted to point out that when you went to hand to hand battle on a ship, you'd board on the deck, in the daylight, but 30-70% of a ship is below deck, lit mostly by candles an the occasional gun port. This meant that a common defense was to abandon the top deck, and ambush as attackers would descend into the ships depths, who of course, were not acclimated to the dim environment below deck. Wearing an eye patch was super useful for this descent, as you'd swap eyes, and immediately had a much better chance of not charging onto a sword. Loved the rest of the video, just wanted to provide a smidge of clarification on the *likely* use for an eye patch for battle.

  • Stekar Knugen
    Stekar Knugen 2 months ago

    They really obsess about this "white european" thing.

  • fizzie
    fizzie 2 months ago

    So... when is luffy gonna be thier king?

  • Spitx Diogo
    Spitx Diogo 2 months ago

    I know it doesn't correlate that much but I don't like the way Portugal is often put aside and after all it had some sort of major role on the land and seas ;)

    JOMOGO 2 months ago +1

    are you a self-hating white guy?

  • Mandeep Singh
    Mandeep Singh 2 months ago

    Must have been fun to be a pirate.. the Hollywood one.

  • EVL R
    EVL R 2 months ago

    what abt Choi San ?

  • hamish de h
    hamish de h 2 months ago

    ok sorry but i disagree respectfully you yourself talk about the white washing white pirates shit you also go on to talk about the lack of sources so therefore to comment that women of all ethnic diversities where not seen on a pirate ship is contradictory, in fact it is almost impossible to imagine that some freed slave who where women joined up especially as certain west african tribes have a culture of women warriors, also everyone about chinese pirates this video full of indesrcimenties but bouncing on my boys dick for hours for it and bye

  • Skreel the Barbarian
    Skreel the Barbarian 2 months ago

    Sir Francis Drake was my great great great great uncle, + or - a few greats

  • Ano Malie
    Ano Malie 2 months ago

    I read about the patch that it was used to make your eye used to the dark but not only to wait till night time. Whenever they had to go inside the ship to get gun powder youre not gonna go with a lit candle so they used the patch to go into this dark spaces to be able to see in the dark they took the patch off.

  • lihkan
    lihkan 2 months ago

    And what about Nassau? That was also pirate town, wasnt it?

  • Sultan Trader
    Sultan Trader 2 months ago

    what a surprise .. .europeans creating a group of people to disrupt another countries ... it keeps happening today its called isis

  • Mini Vinny
    Mini Vinny 2 months ago

    The russians made a better movie of tresure island.

  • steven tea
    steven tea 2 months ago

    To be fair even if they weren't movie pirates they were quite revolutionary for their time. the notion of each man getting a vote was groundbreaking for the time. The sharing of profits; compensation for injury on the job both huge. even while expected nowadays having rules outlawing rape is huge a lot of "civilized" colonies didn't even have that codified into law.

  • Jevofdoom 1234
    Jevofdoom 1234 2 months ago

    Inpressement is what caused the war of 1812

  • Jevofdoom 1234
    Jevofdoom 1234 2 months ago

    I am the invisible man dsh dsh

  • Josh Rick
    Josh Rick 2 months ago

    LMFAO! Why, cuz words are hard. I love your channel!!

  • Donhoi Campbell
    Donhoi Campbell 2 months ago

    I have one name to say Henry Morgan and Port Royal was actually a legally sanctioned port. It had all you could find from pirates to government official everyone from society back then.

  • tremblues
    tremblues 2 months ago

    to yarr or not to yarr...

  • JTM
    JTM 2 months ago

    I’m making my pirates off of those bar barre pirates from now on,

  • dachosenorg
    dachosenorg 2 months ago

    Can you do a video on how Haiti helped with the American revolution and destroyed and island of pirates.

  • Lucias Potter
    Lucias Potter 2 months ago

    Burying treasure and creating a map to come back to it across the ocean on some island or something is dumb and weird come to think of it. All those summers at the beach in California looking for buried treasure.

  • Mirrorwarrior
    Mirrorwarrior 2 months ago +1

    Pirates are the worst kind of scum on hte planet. They were inhuman to say the least. So their glorification is stupid. It's like our descendants glorifying the genocidal Nazi's, British Empire (oh they do that already) or Islamic child rapists 300 years in the future.

  • No One
    No One 2 months ago

    Least i sorta learned something being that about Japanese and Chinese pirates

  • scars and tears
    scars and tears 2 months ago

    this is really antiwhite....