Will I Raise a Son Like Harvey Weinstein?

  • Added:  6 days ago
  • Hey everyone! Mayim Bialik here from The Big Bang Theory and Blossom! Be sure to subscribe to my channel for video updates. This week's vlog is about this Harvey Weinstein thing. It's gotten me thinking about how I raise boys. How do we as a society raise boys? I thought hard, freaked out hard, and made this video. Please, please share this and comment below. Let's start a conversation here.

    My piece about why I'm not surprised:
    groknation.com/hollywood/not-surprised-harvey-weinstein-heres/

    Find me on Social Media:
    www.facebook.com/MissMayim/
    www.facebook.com/MissMayim/
    www.instagram.com/MissMayim/
  • Film & AnimationFilm & Animation
  • Runtime: 6:47
  • harvey weinstein  misogynist  patriarchy  hollywood  celebrities  mogul  sexual assault  parenting  feminism  weinstein  weinstein harvey  harvey  mayim bialik  

Comments: 2 392

  • hundohogger
    hundohogger 8 minutes ago +1

    what sums up this wacky piece is: " IT'S. ON. YOU. " and I'm listening, as a woman (having experienced awful scenarios I neither asked for, or am responsible for) Mayim... whaaaaaaat!?!

  • cheri jane
    cheri jane 32 minutes ago

    Thank you Mayim for helping me to want raise my son in a good way.

  • Greg Jones
    Greg Jones 45 minutes ago

    Translation: "Me me me, I, I, Mine, Me, Mine, Mine, I, I, Me, Me, Me."

  • Tracey
    Tracey 52 minutes ago

    I am sickened about your latest interview. You said, like these two comments "As a proud feminist with little desire to diet, get plastic surgery or hire a personal trainer, I have almost no personal experience with men asking me to meetings in their hotel rooms" and , "I dress modestly. I don’t act flirtatiously with men as a policy" is disgusting! A girl or woman can be sexually abused and it has nothing to do with dressing 'modestly' or if the woman went on diet or not! This is victim-blaming and you should be ashamed for saying such garbage. So guess what, if you teach your sons this, then you ARE raising sons like the sick pig!

  • Jeremiah Burns
    Jeremiah Burns 2 hours ago

    I didn't hear anything which sounded outrageous to me. It was all pretty common sense stuff. And the results *will* show.

    Random tangent (bear with me): I live in England, and there's a *much* higher Asian population than I ever experienced where I lived in the US. As a result, my 9-year old daughter is growing up with schoolmates who are a good raacial mixture. She sees nothing odd in it. Nor should she. I like to tell the anecdote that when she was about 3 or 4 years old, she pointed at Mr T on my A-Team T-shirt and commented that he was 'different'. Dreading what was coming next, I asked her to tell me how he was different. She went on to describe his clothing (open vest, jewellery) and hair (the mowhawk). Skin didn't even get a mention.

    The point is social behaviours are taught and learned. They're not instinctual. Problems like sexism, racism, and homophobia can absolutely be wiped out.

  • Citlali C
    Citlali C 3 hours ago

    tvclip.biz/video/CrezEwUE7pE/

    1:10

  • purva joshi
    purva joshi 3 hours ago

    I don't think wearing clothes that cover all.of my body will help me.not get groped or assaulted.Conservative clothes aren't the solution to this problem. No one must believe that if they cover themselves up they will be less likely to get groped.
    Stop spreading such rubbish. Just unsubscribed from your channel. Thought you were smart.

  • Angie L
    Angie L 5 hours ago

    The casting couch is real, so are the actors and actresses that are willing to go along with it why? because it’s built into the fabric of the business. The vulnerable who don’t go along with it are not only blacklisted but harassed and threatened. Money and power can buy anything, it can buy a career and can also buy murder. Let’s get real.

  • Matrixtechno
    Matrixtechno 6 hours ago

    Just thank you for being the human you are ! The world would be a better place if more people would be like you !

  • dumbblondemallgoth
    dumbblondemallgoth 6 hours ago +1

    feminist icon. i love you.

  • Nleeklee Polowteehow
    Nleeklee Polowteehow 7 hours ago

    hi mayim. i am a christian, so i believe in the part of the bible you do and also the part about Jesus, who i believe is the Messiah. i think my little piece below would be in line with these two parts. good job, by the way, sticking up for what is right and what is even, or should be, normal.
    this is the reality. and people need to pay attention to it, no matter what. if anything bad happened to any of these women who are chiming in now.. it only happened because they gave their assent. how do you not give your assent? you fight him off. you yell. you run. and if you can't do anything, and he rapes you.. or does anything to you (including anything that you had to try to hit him or yell or run from him for).. you go and report it the next second. these women didn't do that. they gave their assent. they are to blame. the first is to blame for what happened to the second. the first and the second are to blame for what happened to the third. the first and the second and the third are to blame for what happened to the fourth.. and each one is to blame for what happened to them if they could have done something to stop it, like scream, run, hit, and did nothing. there is no greatness in coming out now and saying, "he did this to me." all you are saying is that it is your fault for not reporting him and for this happening to all the other women down the line from you. THIS IS REALITY. ANYONE WHO SAYS IT IS NOT IS EVIL.

  • Kathleen Thompson
    Kathleen Thompson 8 hours ago

    My sister started teaching my niece the idea of concent from the time she could talk. If they were tickling her and she said no, they stopped right away. She gets to choose if she wants to kiss or hug goodbye or just say no Thank you and wave instead. It is so important to teach concent from a young age. Everyone should be in charge of what happens to their bodies. Of course there are exceptions like bath time when my sister explains why mommy needs to help her clean herself, but even then it is a point of discussion and explanation with boundaries. Now at age 3 she has confidence in what she wants or doesn't want done and has no problem politely declining an unwanted hug or kiss. I cant wait to see my now one year old nephew grow up with these same guidelines and respect for his body and those of people around him!

  • Kirill Burtsev
    Kirill Burtsev 9 hours ago

    As a man, I totally realize aggressiveness of the men (including sexual). But I also realize a lot about origin of it, through my own experience. The major point is forcing a certain image of the man onto the boys. What is manhood is about. I would say, a lot of images of what should man be or do and quite a lack of real warm human (emotional) connection for boys. That psychological isolation and internal tension from strive to support the image results in aggressive expressions. I understand the desire to raise good man, but not sure that forcing more ideas of how they should behave, what they should like or dislike (whom support and whom not) gonna really help. I believe the best way for to raise boys is being a model of love and trust relationship. If he grows up in warm open and loving environment he will tend to find a way to build it the same way with other females, rather than seek dominance and self validation like it happens a lot now. That is what I think.

    I will not say, that I know how to raise kids, but one thing I know 100% - the man behaves in aggressive way because of internal pain. They don't know how to address it or express it - the only manly way they know is through aggression. That is very important to realize. The man free of pain and fear is a loving man. Well the same goes for woman also, but women usually more and much less aggressive by nature.

  • T Ruth
    T Ruth 9 hours ago

    You're absolutely right! I hate dumb women who brag about being the "cool" girlfriend who takes her boyfriend to strip clubs. That's so disgusting. There's nothing liberating about being a submissive idiot. And I hate that every movie has to have topless chick #1. There's no good reason to have a naked woman in the movie. It won't make the plot any better. I try so hard to avoid those movies. I fucking hate Deadpool for that. There's no reason why a fucking marvel movie needs to have graphic nudity. I get that Deadpool is a scummy hypersexual asshole, but there are ways to portray it without objectifying me. It's disgusting that Ryan remolds is married to someone, who is too good for him, yet he gets a pass for groping a naked woman's breasts for a fucking movie. That's disgusting, and Blake lively can do better. No woman should put up with that shit. #notrelationshipgoals

  • Laura Petrilli
    Laura Petrilli 10 hours ago

    I made my son listen to this excellent

  • Young Guns
    Young Guns 10 hours ago

    I'm betting that there are a number of things that you and I disagree on, but you hit this on the head. Good statement that I support 100%!

  • Cristina M.
    Cristina M. 10 hours ago

    Men don't want only one thing. That's an absurd generalization and oversimplification of complex human beings.

  • Priscilla Andrews
    Priscilla Andrews 11 hours ago

    I don't have children of my own, but everything you said makes perfect sense. Thanks.

  • St.Stbone Boner
    St.Stbone Boner 11 hours ago

    This video gave me cancer

  • Samara Sant Pennartz
    Samara Sant Pennartz 12 hours ago

    I read your article, and I know you didn’t mean it the way some are taking it. I support you 100% and believe your intent was pure.

  • raelonewolf
    raelonewolf 12 hours ago

    I have to agree with her about the shock and outrage thing. Am I outraged? Of course. But I'm definitely not shocked. Sadly, nothing about this is shocking. I'm not even as pessimistic to say "men only want one thing", because I personally don't feel that's true, but it's just so prevalent and so rarely disciplined. Hell, just look at Woody Allen, Bill Cosby, and Donald Trump. Dozens of women/girls and decades of abuse, yet they're still celebrated personas (and in one case, in charge of the launch codes). Abuse is so widely accepted in our culture that it's really not shocking that an abuser found a way to use his position of power to assault women for years.

  • Jute Wood
    Jute Wood 13 hours ago

    You didn't say anything wrong the last time. I never thought that you were excusing Harvey Weinstein's deplorable actions. What a shame people have spun a common sense message into this victimizing the victim narrative. Thank you for speaking up, Mayim!

  • Rob
    Rob 14 hours ago

    I see people have taking out of context what you have said about women dressing modestly. It just takes common sense but your statement is to far beyond their comprehension. Your message is right on. To bad they can't understand it!

  • crazy plate
    crazy plate 15 hours ago

    Let us get it straight. So, these aesthetically beautiful female beings with awesome genetics come along and they want to make it in Hollywood - which, of course, is all about sex at any given moment. They flaunt their naked bodies around even spreading their legs on film but they wanna cry fowl? What did they think was going to happen? That they would be respected as intelligent contributors to society? They have told us about the cousting couch scenarios since the fifties. They have mocked all of the non-jews for years. Why is everyone so surprised? These actresses - the A listers especially - all show their vagina and breasts to millions of viewers in the name of acting/art (let's face it they are exhibitionist whores) and then get nominated for awards for simulating sex on screen. I am a woman and I have zero interest in exhibiting my body in front of anyone except for my husband. These women get paid millions of dollars and are PREDATORS themselves. Please everyone google Demi Moore CREEPY PEDOPHILE INCIDENT TAPES. Harvey Weinstein is JUST THE beginning my friends.

  • Mimi YuYu
    Mimi YuYu 16 hours ago

    Love u. Mayim for prez 2020?

  • Breyauna Sheldon
    Breyauna Sheldon 16 hours ago

    This is amazing. #MeToo

    Check out my story of how I overcame sexual assault.


    www.theodysseyonline.com/student-exchange-and-sexual-assault?utm_source=Facebook&utm_medium=Owned+Social&utm_campaign=Aud+Dev

  • Rand Hooks
    Rand Hooks 17 hours ago

    Boys need 2 general rules as they grow up. Set high standards and high goals. Have the courage to hold your peers to them whether male or female. Example if your in the mall and one of your friends shop lifts and you find out about it, speak up. You don't have to snitch but tell him/her you will not be hanging out with me again if you do that shit. That standard applies to anything, if you don't like people that brag about cheating on tests or partners, have the courage to call it out and don't be afraid to walk away from that friendship. Often times due to the mistrust of boys by society (guilty until proven guilty) they can grow up trying to prove they are great guys. Then they grow fearful of confrontation, and rejection. To young men I'll say society will always look at you as the problem, the only thing you can control is your goals, and the standard you choose to live by. Some people will get it and ride with you, some won't. Just because the world says your untrustworthy due to your gender that doesn't mean you simply trust the opposite gender. Set one standard for everyone, women, men, teachers, pastors, mom, dad, best friends, GF, whatever. As you mature so will your standards, always set goals. When you've reached one mountain top, typically it means your at the base of another. As you achieve each goal your confidence will grow, find ways to help others along the way. This is a really simple way for young men to shape themselves and grow as individuals. Remember you can't control how ppl see you (judgment) and how they respond to you. You can control your response to it. Lastly don't become a guy that hangs with people he doesn't really like, and goes to places he doesn't enjoy that much, for acceptance. Men aren't afraid to walk alone in being true to who they are.

  • Renee Maschke
    Renee Maschke 17 hours ago

    One Boy At A Time.. I like that, & I am going to use that!

  • lycheens
    lycheens 17 hours ago

    I'm glad that you focus on the actions *of the men* here. Your article last week for the NYT was utter garbage... Women no matter their attractiveness, don't do anything to attract *uninvited* advances and assaults. Women may be treated differently because of their looks, but *everyone* needs to say this is not okay early and often because it seems that message is hard for some people.
    www.nytimes.com/2017/10/13/opinion/mayim-bialik-feminist-harvey-weinstein.html

  • Joe Smith
    Joe Smith 18 hours ago +1

    Can someone please tell me why Weinstein is pronounced wine -steen and not wine stine? The same vowels are in the same place in both parts of the name. I don't get it.

  • Elysa Gaona
    Elysa Gaona 18 hours ago

    Victim blamers like you are one of many reasons why assault victims can’t come forward.

    When a fellow woman says you’re clothing is a factor into your assault, then your just as bad as an assaulter.

    You should make a video about how you were wrong in that assumption.

  • TheStavros1001
    TheStavros1001 19 hours ago

    I have to wonder about the comment about leaving if somebody is so drunk that they are throwing up. Isn't that turning your back and abandoning somebody who is essentially helpless, and worse, may die from alcohol poisoning?

  • zyxwut321
    zyxwut321 19 hours ago

    Wow, Mayim means well but she seems to get caught up in her absolutes and black and white thinking. So, porn and strip clubs are on the same moral plane as sexual harassment and assault? What about the rights of women who work in those environments of their own free will? This seems to harken back to the weaknesses of sex-negative second wave feminism.

  • Aneta Hall
    Aneta Hall 19 hours ago

    I've watched few of your videos and I see a pattern emerging.  I'm aware of the message you are trying to send, but you seem to be confused about a few things.  One thing for starters - women and men are NOT the same, therefore we are not EQUAL or "virtually the same" as you point out.  
    Men are not able to bear children, nor breastfeed them.  Men have penises and we have vaginas. Men have more testosterone than women, hence their more aggressive behavior. Women have more progesterone. We have unique DNA, no other person has the same fingerprint as you, even my 4 year old knows the difference. If a pregnant woman, can behave differently because of hormone fluctuations, then why are we ignoring science when it comes to non-pregnant states? 
    What do we tell our kids: "You are special and amazing. There is no one like you in this world" OR "you are not more important than the person sitting next to you on the train, because you are equal",  therefore every time a stranger dies do you grieve their death as if it was your own child?  Of course not.
    I think more appropriate word for what you are trying to express is "right to succeed", "right to thrive equally", "right to make choices" not "we are equal"

    We don't ask our newborns when we breastfeed them whether it's ok for us to touch them, because we want to uphold their right to consent to touch.  We violate their right and teach them the "wrong" lesson for many years before we turn around and go back.  Again, nonspecific and confusing explanation.  I tell my 3 kids of both genders that they have a right to decline affection and their private parts are off limits.  If a teacher pats my daughter on a shoulder because she is in a "state of daze" and doesn't respond to being called by name, I do not want her to think her right to be touched was violated.  Details are important, as you yourself point out in a different video when you make a distinction between "girl" and "woman".

    #4 - This is mind boggling to me frankly and shows how stupid people really are - why would ANYONE put themselves in a position to be so drunk that they would be in a "lights out" situation - and expect other drunk people to act as if they were sober and reflective?  
    Wrong lesson here. Rather than to expect the minds of other intoxicated people change and act sober in specific situations, you tell your kids that you NEVER drink so much that you aren't aware of your senses. Teach them about moderation and science.  My mother told me to get "drunk" at home first, so I could see how my body reacted to alcohol.   Very simple and logical and that's how I learned I have adverse reaction to alcohol and don't care much for it at all.  The likelihood of having a completely sober person at a party where everyone is drunk is very slim, so it is safe to assume, that if you are going to be at a party with alcohol, you are responsible for yourself and your drinking habits.  It is NEVER ok to drink so much that you have to "crush" at someone's place.
    I like it where you are going with this video or what you are trying to achieve, however, anyone who gets so drunk they "black out" isn't respecting their own rights or those of others, by putting themselves in a dangerous situation and shifting responsibility onto someone else.  

    This is why I teach my kids actual facts and instead of using blanket words as "equality" I use precise words like "respecting life as our life is our divine gift".  I tell them that we are not equal.  Why?  Because if we were equal, we would not abort babies, so I'm sorry to say, but - we are not equal and never will be.  Every life, however, has a right to thrive equally and make choices based on their best ability and capacity.<3

  • No_Frills_MTG
    No_Frills_MTG 20 hours ago

    Where did you get that basket in that bookshelf?

  • Sam Easton
    Sam Easton 20 hours ago

    I think a great video in the near future is the bio effects of addiction. Yours truly has been dealing with addiction (I won't say what, but it rhymes with corn), and something that helps me deal with it is understanding the biology of what addiction does to the brain's chemistry. Keep up with the vids; I'm enjoy the variety of intellectual discussions taking place.

  • Jesse Williams
    Jesse Williams 20 hours ago

    *the industry you "work" in... Not YOUR industry.
    No one gives af how you raise your son's.
    Go parent them and stfu.

  • Isabella Brand
    Isabella Brand 20 hours ago

    I think every mother tries to raise their son to not become a Harvey Weinstein sometimes mental issues aren’t foreseeable but starting with the virtues that you named is a good start maybe teach them also to talk about thoughts they have that might be wrong because it is okay to have them but it is important not to act on them and if you’re not strong enough get help so you don’t become criminal! If we start at the roots of the problem we don’t have to deal with the aftermath!

  • Michael Doling
    Michael Doling 21 hour ago

    Just read an article about you on jspace.com wasn't too complementary about video here. Mostly focused about your comments about doe eyed pouty lips comment and about dressing modestly also reactive comments very negative

  • Suzanne Reardon-Mulhall
    Suzanne Reardon-Mulhall 21 hour ago +1

    I am just so done. Just so you know, a woman can dress as modestly as you do and still get sexually abused or harassed. Been there, done that, because I worked in a male-dominated field. Just because it didn't happen to you doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

    Basically, you're saying that I was too provocatively dressed at 5 years old and what I was wearing enticed a man to pleasure himself while I was forced to watch? That I 'asked for it' when I was too young to know what 'it' was? That it happened because I was 'pretty', when looks have nothing to do with it, but power over another does.

    Your intelligence and wit always impressed me. However, your lack of compassion and empathy for those who have had experiences that differ from yours? Callous, cold, rude, and deplorable. Done with your channel and won't watch another thing you post here or anywhere.

    Thank you so much for negating experiences of millions of women. It horrifies me.

  • aussenseiter2000
    aussenseiter2000 21 hour ago

    +Mayim Bialik Thank you for adressing that topic. Although I agree with most of your points, i couldn't help but notice you seem a little too prejudiced against men in general. Sure almost all men want sex but for the most of us, it is not the main intention for every action we do... And I don't really understand your problem with pornography. Everyone has a sex drive. Some have a stronger and some have a weaker and watching porn/masturbating will satify us. Usually pornography isn't degrading women. You watch people having consensual sex,men and women. If you have a problem with pornography because of your religion thats not a very valid point... many people don't believe in god at all. English is not my first or second language so i hope i have expressed myself properly.

  • Dorothy Day Kate Duvall

    Emily Ratajkowski Blasts ‘Big Bang Theory’ Star For Weinstein Op-Ed
    Posted By Katie Jerkovich On 7:07 PM 10/15/2017

    Emily Ratajkowski blasted “Big Bang Theory” star Mayim Bialik for “victim blaming” for her op-ed about Harvey Weinstein’s decades-long sexual harassment and sexual assault accusations.

    “So @missmayim ‘advice’ is: I was never pretty & never tried to be & ladies, take note if you don’t want to be harassed? This isn’t feminism,” the 26-year-old Sports Illustrated Swimsuit model tweeted Sunday, along with a link to the article in the New York Times under the headline, “Being a Feminist in Harvey Weinstein’s World.”

    So @missmayim “advice” is: I was never pretty & never tried to be & ladies, take note if you don’t want to be harassed? This isn’t feminism pic.twitter.com/0Rrx6jrE5K

    — Emily Ratajkowski (@emrata) October 15, 2017

    “Victim blaming at its finest,” she added.

    VIctim blaming at its finest @missmmayim t.co/8DWw6BgRRl

    — Emily Ratajkowski (@emrata) October 15, 2017

    The comment comes in response to an excerpt from Bialik’s piece about not acting flirtatious with men as being “self-protecting and wise.”

    “I still make choices everyday as a 41-year-old actress that I think of as self-protecting and wise,” Bialik wrote. “I have decided that my sexual self is best reserved for private situations with those I am most intimate with. I dress modestly. I don’t act flirtatiously with men as a policy.”

    The SI swimsuit model joined a growing list of women who blasted the actress for the article, including Patricia Arquette.

    “@missmayim229 I have to say I was dressed non-provocatively as a 12 year old when men on the street masturbated at me. It’s not clothing,” Arquette tweeted.

    @missmayim229 I have to say I was dressed non provocatively as a 12 year old when men on the street masturbated at me. It’s not clothing.

    — Patricia Arquette (@PattyArquette) October 14, 2017

    Really want to again congratulate @missmayim on being too SMART to be PRETTY ENOUGH to get raped. What a great take to give to the world.

    — Amanda Duarte (@duarteamanda) October 14, 2017

    Mayim Bialik missed the perfect opportunity to call out men in Hollywood. Instead she blames women. t.co/kBJPGXhwI1

    — Ines Helene (@inihelene) October 14, 2017

    Bialik responded to some of the backlash, on Twitter calling it “vicious.”

    “I’m being told my N.Y. Times piece resonated with so many and I am beyond grateful for all of the feedback,” Bialik tweeted. “I also see a bunch of people have taken my words out of the context of the Hollywood machine and twisted them to imply that God forbid I would blame a woman for her assault based on her clothing or behavior. Anyone who knows me and my feminism knows that’s absurd and not at all what this piece was about. It’s so sad how vicious people are being when I basically live to make things better for women.”

    Being told my @NYTimes piece resonated w/ so many. Also see some have taken my words out of the context of the Hollywood machine. See below: pic.twitter.com/0NmxtAF1vP

    — Mayim Bialik (@missmayim) October 15, 2017

    dailycaller.com/2017/10/15/emily-ratajkowski-blasts-big-bang-theory-star-for-weinstein-op-ed/

  • riverw007
    riverw007 Day ago

    Are entirety of women in Hollywood busting their asses to make this a women's issue in hopes it takes the spotlight off what is going on with the child actors? Is it just selfishness or an effort to keep the conversation steered away from a much more important problem and protect Hollywood from the inevitable financial backlash?

  • char jl
    char jl Day ago

    If you were never sexually harassed in Hollywood, do you think it has anything to do with being Jewish? I'm not trying to be anti-Semitic, but it's time we start recognizing Jewish privilege.

  • magnolias n tea
    magnolias n tea Day ago

    Two thumbs up for MODESTY!

  • Elizabeth B
    Elizabeth B Day ago +2

    ***I find it hysterical that you defend yourself on your NYT op-end regarding Harvey Weinstein.  You use the words.....God forbid I would blame a woman for her assault based on her clothing or behavior.  Mayim, when you use the term 'God Forbid' to defend yourself after YOU participated in a profanity laced video using God's name in Vain is hypocritical.  You offended me and my Christianity by using the terms **Jesus F* Christ and Godd*m.**  **Not only once but several times in your Funny or Die video with Rachel, Elizabeth and countless other B rate actors.  Why don't you apologize for that????  Keep your mouth shut and make your obnoxious salary filming your 22 minute per episode piece of crap.**

  • canuck canuck
    canuck canuck Day ago

    Eh, blossom you ignorant fuck, Normal, healthy men want just the same as women you elitiest narrasistc, fuck'n moron. It would do you dumb hollywood types to have grown up in Canada, around normal, healthy, working families. Had that been the case, you Blossom, and your pal Harvey wouldn't be the garbage humans you are today.

  • Debra Humphrey
    Debra Humphrey Day ago

    I think you got it right anybody says you haven't they don't know I'm coming beans about my about life they think that it's okay to do the things you said and it's okay to go or do or see whatever you said they don't have a concept of being a girl or a woman or a male that needs help you are raising your son's to be caring men young men and I appreciate that you are thank you for being your awesome best bye

  • Ariana Escalante

    Saw your Facebook video and immediately came over to YT to subscribe. THANK YOU for your brilliant response to this crazy Harvey incident! I'm a TV host and (new) youtuber and would absolutely love to collaborate with you. Let me know. I'm in LA :)

  • 42 jade
    42 jade Day ago

    your attitude is still trying to take power away from women. i realize it is ingrained in you, but it does not help the situation. lucky you that none of this happened to you, but you are still victim blaming instead of placing blame where it belongs. open your eyes to the victims instead of being so judgmental. rethink your attitude.

  • EA LA
    EA LA Day ago

    Thank you!! We need more people to speak the truth. And we especially need people with more privileges to stand up for those with less privilege. We also need to keep having these types of conversations among our communities/friends/families.

  • Suraj Jaganathan

    I have been through all your videos because I think you are very smart and a great comedienne! But one thing is clear. You clearly hate men and physically beautiful "sexy" women. You once wrote that being appreciated for looks is no way of leading a happy life for a girl. That statement is riddled with feminist arrogance and superiority. Models rake in millions and partner up with successful, good looking men. For most people thats not bad. Try to appreciate all the hard work and determination it takes to maintain a model-like body instead of belittling women who dont have PhDs like you.

  • Kendra Fleming
    Kendra Fleming Day ago

    dont go to strip clubs?....huh?

  • Michelle Stewart
    Michelle Stewart Day ago +1

    It is very true, empirically verifiable, that humans are all virtually the same. Our individual differences are so minimal as to be almost negligible. Dogs (as just one species in contrast) are amazingly diverse. One healthy, well-developed dog brain can differ from another by orders of magnitude. Recognizing our essential sameness as humans matters, because it equips us to be kinder, more sensitive, wiser in our relations with each other. This was a powerful vid... so glad I happened across this channel!

  • Tooty Futts
    Tooty Futts Day ago +1

    To steal a line from another forum, you're proving yourself to be one of the dumbest smart people ever.

  • S Johns
    S Johns Day ago +1

    I think it is absolute sexism to confine all men into this "sex hungry rapist" category. most men were brought up to respect women including me. Weinstein (according to his allegations) obviously a horrid exception. Women used to be majorly oppressed, however it has lessened since the 20th century. I treat women with the utmost respect but I expect the same in return, we are just people who should respect each other equally regardless of gender or race. However disgusting Weinstein's allegations are it is important that we come to our own conclusions based on facts and a thorough examination of evidence. If he is guilty of these heinous acts then he should be penalized for his transgressions

  • Charles Gluckman

    Great message. I hope and pray that a lot of people are positively affected by Mayim’s message.

  • Mary O'Brien
    Mary O'Brien Day ago

    You said it so well.

  • Mireyana Crespo
    Mireyana Crespo Day ago

    I like the way you talk because a non English speaker, like me, can understand you... now about the video it’s very helpful giving me a lot of ideas of what to keep in mind when I take my turn of raise my own kids (which I don’t have yet) however about the point of “consent” in my case I came from a family where give hugs or kisses it’s totally normal! And I think that it’s important to keep in mind the background (in both sides) ones must understand why are “touchy” people (not bad touchy I mean) and the others have to understand why there’s people who don’t like to be touch... thank you!
    BTW: huuuuuge TBBT fan!!!
    (Sorry if there’s any misspell)

  • TheatricalLady
    TheatricalLady Day ago

    As a mother who has a month old baby boy and a nearly three year old girl... Thank you. This made me think... A lot!!

  • ovrava
    ovrava Day ago

    what when they find out that #1 is false though? Or is just true in some symbolic or metaphorical way

  • d simmons
    d simmons Day ago

    #8... We tell kids not to murder. and percentage wise, few do. We tell girls not to be in a position where they can be sexually assaulted, and most girls are careful. How about when telling boys not to rob, murder, hit... tell children EXPLICITLY (even though most assailants are men) not to commit sexual assault.

  • John Dawson
    John Dawson Day ago

    I have many women friends and I have never considered sex with them. Kind of rude that you would suggest that all men went sex from women.

  • Richard Mattingly

    Mayim....Weinstein would be hitting on Women if he ran a fast food franchise and he'd think that they would want to hookup in men's room if they smiled will handing them their order. There are those that believe the world exists only to serve them or get in their way and it's a nureological reality they have that can't be unlearned.

  • Seth LeMay
    Seth LeMay Day ago

    You lose all credibility for "consent" and "bodily autonomy" when you violently commissioned both your boys genitals be mutilated. You show that equality only matters when it's for women's genitals but you clearly don't give a shit about your boys right to their body. You are a pathetic hypocrit. Trash.

  • Harambe Ok
    Harambe Ok Day ago

    Mayim, I was 12 years old when I walking to school one day. I was dressed in my school uniform which consisted of trousers, a shirt and tie and a blazer, oh and a jacket because it was cold that day. I had my hair in a low pony tail and my glasses on. I wasn't wearing makeup or perfume because I wasn't interested in those things and my parents didn't let me wear them. A man approached me. An older man wearing a long coat. I tried to walk past him but he blocked my path. He was very tall. He opened his coat and showed me his penis. I'd never seen a man's penis before. I was very frightened and I knew instantly I was in danger. Luckily, a car horn went off and distracted him. I ran away. I ran faster than I knew I could run. When I got to school I told my teacher what happened. She called the police.

    Did I deserved to be harassed? Was it because of how I dressed or how I behaved? Do you think what this man did to me was ok? Did I not use the right judgement when walking to school that day?

  • Gary Smith
    Gary Smith Day ago +1

    You could also call out all the people whom assisted him or turned a blind eye to assist their career while you are at it. The same people screaming about rape culture elsewhere need clean their own house.

  • misskaedy
    misskaedy Day ago

    You think you are unattractive just because a man has not sexually harassed or assaulted you........? You are not an unattractive woman just because it hasn't happened to you, stop thinking that way.

  • misswhiskeykittie
    misswhiskeykittie Day ago +2

    Unsubbed. I used to admire you but your comments in the Times disgust me.

  • sunshine gurl
    sunshine gurl Day ago

    I agree with you 💯

  • Mary Allison
    Mary Allison Day ago +3

    Mayim, I refuse to watch this video. So you make money off my watching this video. I just saw via Twitter your comments concerning your friend Harvey Weinstein. I was shocked and disappointed and disturbed by your comments regarding the comments of children and of actresses who have worked hard and had success even though they turned down your friends advances. I couldn't believe my eyes when I read that you said little girls who have and had more traditional pretty faces and soft voices and who were willing got preferential treatment are more likely to be raped. And women who dress according to style trends are also more likely to be raped. Saying that and that you haven't been raped because of the fact you dress conservative and are a "good girl" is so wrong. You haven't been raped because you were fortunate not to be. Rape has nothing to do with sex or physical appearance it has to do with power and control. I have read other comments why didn't they speak up sooner. Oh they dressed like sluts and agreed to meet him in his hotel room they deserved it. . It is because of comments like these that women don't report it sooner. And because when a woman reports a rape she has to answer questions about what she was wearing, and was she somewhere she shouldn't have been? Was she drinking? Was she drunk? Didn't she know better. Did she ask for it? DID SHE ASK FOR IT. REALLY??? Rape is the only crime that the victim has to prove she wasn't to blame. They would never ask a guy who's house was broken into and robbed. What he (victim) had been wearing? What he (victim) had been doing? If he (victim) was somewhere he shouldn't have been? Was he (victim) drinking? Was he (victim) drunk? Was he (victim) flirting and giving signs he was interested? This is 2017 not 1878 when pureatines ruled everyone's actions. I wish I didn't love Big bang theory. It breaks my heart but Mayims horrible attitude and responsible and justification in saying a woman asked to be raped makes me NOT want to support and watch anything and everything she is connected to as a actress and what I considered a activist for the human treatment of all of God's creatures.

  • Jack Bauer
    Jack Bauer Day ago

    Excellent post Mayim, I hope others will both view and reflect on this.

  • Rated R
    Rated R Day ago

    It's so awesome that you're a youtuber. I never knew you had a youtube channel but now that I know you do you can bet I'll watch.

  • Méril
    Méril Day ago

    my ex and I found out how deeply ingrained in our brains the idea of men as sexual beings is very early on in our relationship. I wanted to get to know each other before having sex and he was completely okay with that. when we started having sex he completely changed personality, I was very upset because I noticed he was detached from me suddenly, and he even mentioned that he did not consider us a couple. As we were dating for about 2 months I was really upset. we had a talk and he told me that he was forced into intercourses by his first girlfriend, that he faked sexual arousal and orgasms to get rid of her, that he felt that he could not say no, because he was a guy and guys wanted to have sex all the time. I was floored because I thought so too. I was scared of hurting him even more, I had to forget all I thought I knew and learn it all, trust him to teach me. It took a long time, but I thank him for this lesson.

  • Rose Howard
    Rose Howard Day ago +1

    Just read your piece in NY times and it's obvious you are so ignorant about how things work. It's unfortunate. I was in the military never dressed in anything that could be viewed as not modest or wore makeup. Also never went to a hotel room or a casting couch. That doesn't seem to matter when disgusting pigs see something they want. You are pretentious and a helicopter parent that will undoubtedly raise entitled little pigs that will go out into the world and probably traumatize some girls.

  • PonderNRave
    PonderNRave Day ago +1

    What you had with your op-ed is an opportunity to address the patriarchal institutions that makes Weinstein’s behavior permissive. It has nothing to do with dressing modestly. Women in the east are abused and they are covered head to toe.
    It has to do with power, and you made this piece about yourself...your obvious insecurities about your own looks and somehow making yourself feel better FINALLY for not getting plastic surgery because who knows..maybe Harvey would have gone after you. You have such a narrow view of the problem, you didn’t at all address the root cause. It’s not just women in Hollywood, child actors in Hollywood like Cory Haim were raped. Does that have to do with looks?
    No, he was 11. Seriously Mayim, you could have done so much more with your platform and you made it about yourself.

  • Feministe Wynn
    Feministe Wynn Day ago

    "stripclubs, and places where people get paid to have sex: don't go there." uhm. maybe you shouldn't suggest to your sons that sex workers are wrong or are not capable of making the conscious decision to utilize their sexuality on their own terms. sex workers and sex trafficking are NOT the same thing.

    • Cece_Mich
      Cece_Mich Day ago +1

      Feministe Wynn she probably thinks sex workers are some kind of evil people with red horns. Her ignorance and internalized misogyny is showing.

  • Jean D
    Jean D Day ago

    People should stop pretending to me morally outraged- we all know we're enjoying the salacious spectacle. And we all know 90% of these actresses accusations are pure bullshit but we pretend to believe them. Ooooh bad, evil, wicked Harvey! Booooo! Boooooo! *pass the popcorn*

  • Marc Lowenstein
    Marc Lowenstein Day ago

    Thanks for this, Ms. Bialik. I very much appreciate your message. I would only add that for me it is subtler than 'we are all equal'. In the most important sense yes, we are all equal. But, as you imply in the beginning, men are indeed different (on average) in their behavioral tendencies. Some of these are perhaps to the good, but others require active civilizing. That is the process you are describing in your 7 point plan, but I think it requires a more explicit acknowledgement that there are many (most?) of us who have natural tendencies that require tempering. It makes the process more difficult but more honest and hopefully more effective: the compassion in the statement "I know you have these hormonal or psychological urges but here is why they might be destructive and here is how they can be better channeled" makes it more effective. I think.

    I do believe it is not only possible but necessary to reconcile treating everyone as a respected individual while acknowledging different tendencies in boys and girls. As the dad of a boy and two girls I can tell you that they sure are different from each other, and the boy is different from the girls in different ways. They require slightly different applications of the same civilizing principles of compassion and respect.

    Which leads me to my one quibble with your excellent talk: the identitarian list. I understand the historical need for support for marginalized individuals. But they are just that: *individuals* who have been marginalized because of some social status or construct. I think there is some point -- perhaps, debatedly, not yet reached, but some point -- at which automatically collecting them in groups, and reciting the religious litany of identity actually harms their individuality more than it supports their struggle. Group think can be the enemy of compassion. Thus Spielberg's red coated girl in Schindler's list, and thus the fact that my son is * very * different from my daughters, but my daughters also have unique gifts and challenges. Automated identity lists can get in the way.

    My own answer to the extremely important question you raise "how not to raise children who are monsters" has led me, like you, to try to find ways to communicate universal principles and then help manage the unique messiness of applying them to growing souls. (First the entire Talmud on one foot, but then the entire Talmud, as it were . . .)

    In this regard, I think, demonstrating and modeling and discussing the details of compassion and kindness is the best medicine. It acknowledges urges, and it encourages respect and love of individuals.

    I really always used to laugh at the BuJews, but I seem to have become one . . .

    Thank you again. I appreciate you using your visibility so wonderfully and so productively.

    Marc

  • Jim Wright
    Jim Wright Day ago +1

    How your sons turn out depends on what sort of role model their father is.

  • zachary romeo
    zachary romeo Day ago

    The fact that you even need to make a video like this is what's very wrong !!!

  • Анастасия Мамай

    Thank you so much!!!
    From Russia.

  • Michael D.
    Michael D. Day ago

    Once again, feminism and identity politics are used by the media as a way to divert real structural changes in society.

  • Sara Hamilton
    Sara Hamilton Day ago

    I love that you give hope but I would suggest culture. I understand he blamed culture but culture does have element in. I would also say have relationship with your teenager. Those are the most important years, because they have hormones and are settling into identity.

  • Phobe Laxu
    Phobe Laxu Day ago

    Wait, don't go to strip clubs, don't patronise prostitutes, don't watch porn?

  • manny soler
    manny soler 2 days ago

    i forgot i left out one name steven seagal

  • Mania Tzanetakou
    Mania Tzanetakou 2 days ago

    I think that you have an interesting thought, but I disagree. You and the next person, or anyone truly, cannot be certain as to how will their children (sons or daughters) will grow up as. You may have the purest intentions and try as hard as you can, every single day to give your children good lessons, but you can never know for sure how will that kid grow up. He/She may have some different experiences that you have told him it's the normal thing to have or bad influences and make bad decisions. I believe that good parenting for the parents and immediate family perspective is a very, very important step to raise not only good men / good women but, good people in general. You must not assume however that person will turn out the way you have indented them to, even If you strived your best to make sure they don't become Harvey Weinstein.

  • Linda Sliwowski
    Linda Sliwowski 2 days ago +1

    From this post, you have demonstrated and exhibited through this entire process a true lack of moral clarity. This entire video is a bastardized version of yourself and a voice that you are projecting onto everyone else. There is so much dog whistling in this video. I suspect, this is your true self. I actually think that you are wearing a disguise and you secretly hate beautiful women. My sister is beautiful, dynamic, smart, strong, comfortable in her own skin. I’m proud of her tbh. She blooms with grace. Living and experiencing the bounty of life can never be experienced or realized in a straitjacket. You are a step back. Your words are contributing to a painful discord in our country. Then again, this is all about YOUR perfect record. So shallow and opportunistic. Like I said, you lack moral clarity. Do progress and humanity  a favor, stop sharing your limited understanding of compassion. SHUT UP! Stop sharing your ugly. We all see it. You actually come across as hurt and rejected. Also, undesirable. Some how you have introduced yourself as a victim. This song is not about you.

    • Linda Sliwowski
      Linda Sliwowski Day ago

      Your virtual self is unfortunately mortal and because you are uneducated, I deem you noise and nothing more. You are just like the extreme right. Listening to a dangerous hyperbole of loud voices because you can’t think individually and  independently. You adopt and you are modular and a peg to be placed by the originals. You can’t contribute. Yourself can't. It's not your fault. Just vanish. You are whats wrong with women rights.

    • Linda Sliwowski
      Linda Sliwowski Day ago

      Some esentuail reading for you. 

      The Handmaid's Tale 
      The Bell Jar
      Jane Eyre 
      A Room of One's Own 
      The Second Sex 
      Pride and Prejudice 
      The Color Purple 
      The Yellow Wallpaper and Other Stories 
      The Vagina Monologues 
      The Feminine Mystique 
      The Awakening 
      I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings 
      The Beauty Myth 
      Beloved 
      The Hunger Games (The Hunger Games, #1) 
      Speak 


      yup, I've read all.

    • Linda Sliwowski
      Linda Sliwowski Day ago

      Could you please point to something intelligent that you have contributed to this conversation or even a single fact? Seems like you’re more concerned about curbing my voice. The things that you have mentioned have been taken out of context to suit your own agenda. Now, I’ll be as straightforward as I can. You’re stupid! That’s all! Consider thinking independently.

    • Linda Sliwowski
      Linda Sliwowski Day ago

      I will pursue with vengeance anyone that disrespects the women in my family. I was brought up in a home of equals. No one gets to tell the women in my family how to behave, act or dress. It is so stupid.  It is as it should be. Beautifully effortless. If a man hurts my sister,  all of the world will be red. This women does not deserve the credit bestowed upon her. Yes her words in the NYTimes hurt.

    • Linda Sliwowski
      Linda Sliwowski Day ago

      I am not your enemy. I am your ally.

  • Matt Turner
    Matt Turner 2 days ago

    Bailik and avital's thoughts on weinstein
    Hell of a coincidence

  • Kaytie Broadhurst
    Kaytie Broadhurst 2 days ago

    I don’t agree with your sexual harassment op-ed I tried my best to analyze the context and place from which you were coming. I think the problem is there are two separate issues you attempted to address. The issue of leading a meaningful life regardless of appearance and the issue of sexual assault. You’re a feminist which means you should see all women as equal there are no perfect 10’s because a woman isn’t a prized pig at a country farm. I understand that in your mind taking certain precautions to avoid assault may seem obvious. However,We have to balance as a civilized society the ideal that while no one should drunkenly walk home dressed provocatively it doesn’t equate to rape as a deserved outcome. I realize we cannot he naive about being our own best protectors. We also cannot victim blame or ignore the bigger issue that this world raises rapists. They rape people of all ages ,genders,shapes,and sizes. No sliding scale saves you because rape is about power not sex.

    • FrankieCh
      FrankieCh 2 days ago

      I have to disagree with your definition of feminism here. Feminism doesn't mean you're not allowed to acknowledge differences in the way women look or the fact that many men tend to rate a woman's look on a scale. Feminism means you won't let those men's expectations define you, and you won't let your "not a perfect 10" look stop you from pursuing your dreams.

  • Alicia Townes
    Alicia Townes 2 days ago +1

    I think they will since you will plant the notion that only “modest” girl don’t get raped. Please don’t write anymore shitty op-eds

  • The Orange Pekoe Teabag Band

    A good starting point, when raising a boy, is to teach them to SIT everytime they pee.

  • AtheistVlogger
    AtheistVlogger 2 days ago

    I worry about having a son all time, especially because right now I'm in a phase where I generally avoid all men. I've learned to distrust them or in general dislike them. Too many interacts with guys who seriously need to check their privilege. I've felt with too many situations where a guy is totally out of line and horrible to the point where I purposely avoid eye contact and conversation with them. But then I think what if I had a son? Would I feel negatively toward him for that? I hope not. Would I raise him better? I mean I hope so but how do you truly know?

  • Henry Smith
    Henry Smith 2 days ago

    Equality - like equal protecting from genital mutilation? not in the usa. Rights? Consent? Did you get those when the knife went inside your baby's genitals?

  • Henry Smith
    Henry Smith 2 days ago

    Lesson 1 on Consent and how to raise Boys. Don't cut off body parts that don't belong to you. Which you violated when you ordered a baby to have his genitals mutilated. Violating and abusing the private parts of children is exactly the kind of behavior that needs stop.

  • chinchilla in the villa

    While you're at it you should also tell the parents of girls to not raise their daughters to be like that either.

  • Karen B
    Karen B 2 days ago

    I have always admired your acting since Beaches, although didn't get to watch Blossom because I had joined the Army by then and no personal TV for a while. We don't see totally eye to eye politically, but I have 2 sons myself. Like your father, I probably led them to not trust women. I think you were a bit overprotected, too. Not necessarily a bad thing in the acting arena though. I support you in this and giving good advice is not putting blame on the victims of assault. You, of all people, would know your industry from child to adult. I am glad you didn't change yourself to accommodate Hollywood. You are not just beautiful, but very talented.

  • TinyCareDan
    TinyCareDan 2 days ago

    One of the best articulate and precise videos I’ve ever seen on YouTube.

  • oneburntpixel
    oneburntpixel 2 days ago

    Oh God..another Hollywood idiot capitalizing on a disgusting situation they had nothing to do with pretending to be a victim somehow. Hollywood actors really are special personalities. Bunch of Narcissists.

  • Cathy H.
    Cathy H. 2 days ago +1

    This is the type of video that I'd like to see go viral. The value of it is not in Mayim being 100% right about everything she said (though I DO agree with most all of it), it's that an intelligent woman presented her opinion, on a number of issues, in a very articulate, respectful manner This allows anyone (who is genuinely "seeking" to entertain all aspects of this subject) an opportunity to consider ideas different from their own.  I think the unspoken answer which underlines her "will I raise a son..." question, is that there are so many obstacles to consider when parenting a son to NOT end up like Harvey Weinstein, that we should be doing it with intention. Raising sons who respect women is an intentional undertaking. Thank you for your contribution to this issue Mayim. You bring warmth and humour to your insights, and I find myself wishing that we were friends because I think it would make me a better person ... I certainly would laugh more :) #respect