6 Popular Survival Tips That Will Get You Killed

  • Published on Mar 13, 2017
    If your life depends on these tips, it's best to just embrace your death immediately rather than prolong the inevitable.
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    6 Popular Survival Tips That Will Get You Killed
    survival skills survival tips
    the spit take man of steel
  • ComedyComedy

Comments • 2 519

  • art lazono
    art lazono 3 hours ago

    if I ever get suicidal I will just watch this again...pfft. sucked.

  • TheRealDanBond
    TheRealDanBond 20 hours ago

    Why tf would you play dead with a shark. They’re most likely attacking you bc they think you’re yummy.

  • bubbiesdad
    bubbiesdad Day ago


  • _ _
    _ _ 9 days ago

    Never use your phone in a lightening storm it a cunduitbof electricity and its like inviting the lighten to strike you.....and never walk on the beach same thing....

  • _ _
    _ _ 9 days ago

    Getting under a strudy table is wrong you have to put the table at a 90° angle against a wall to prevent byou getting trapped under rubble above and around an upright table.... works with anything that can have flat end the facing wall

  • void735
    void735 12 days ago

    Oh americans and their papper houses.

  • The Dude
    The Dude 13 days ago

    Drinking your own pee will poison you

  • Zhazmin Wynter Defiyahqueen

    No. No. No. Where is Roger in this video. Suddenly not interested.

  • IloveEmilia andRem
    IloveEmilia andRem 15 days ago

    Thanks too this channel my trust issues are even worse.

  • N Marrs
    N Marrs 18 days ago

    Yea “accidentally” killed my spouse.

  • hizoka andou
    hizoka andou 19 days ago +1

    The earthquake advice is bad. I know, because I'm from Chile.

  • Immanuel T
    Immanuel T 22 days ago

    I read on wikihow that playing dead doesn't work on a lot of predators like lions and other creatures because they hunt for meat. That it only works on creatures that attack when frightened😕.....still need to conduct more research though.

  • TrashPanda 365
    TrashPanda 365 24 days ago

    Avoid a shark attack? Stay the fuck out of the ocean! :D

  • the puginator
    the puginator 24 days ago

    Wtf is that tornado advise dude I was in a tornado when I was a kid in Gifford IL and a F3 tornado legit fucking torn the house next us away and only resoan are didn't is because the old af tree held together my little chains fell on the house to hold it down if we had the damn windows open or something we would have died cuz we hid in the bathroom so yea don't open the windows

  • Michaela J
    Michaela J 26 days ago

    Easy peasy... what? 😂😂

  • Harry Potter
    Harry Potter 26 days ago

    Y U say crap?
    Y should I Belize U instead of the Others should Tell Shit?
    U dont give ans evidence, nö Proof y ur Shit should ne tru

  • danielle feliciano-arnold

    People are afraid to let someone close there eyes because they are afraid that means they are dying because they arent responding. It's just like instinct to do it out of fear. When you are talking to someone and having them interact with you it makes you feel they are going to be Ok because they are responding and if they are conscious and responding its obviously better then someone who cant respond and are losing consciousness. Thats Why people do it, anyone would unless told not to by a doctor.

  • Nicky O'Donnell
    Nicky O'Donnell 29 days ago +3

    @8:45 Swallowing your tongue is definitely possible. People die every year swallowing their tongue playing football (soccer).

  • Chelsea Juiliano
    Chelsea Juiliano Month ago

    So much uninformed bullshit

  • Cursed Content
    Cursed Content Month ago +3

    Where I live trees have moss on all sides so I always knew it was a conspiracy

  • allie cady
    allie cady Month ago

    " *easy peasy harry fked a weasley* "
    i'm done

  • goldenapple saga
    goldenapple saga Month ago +3

    6:42 it's a giant! MUSHROOM!

  • Tainted Lilly
    Tainted Lilly Month ago

    If you play dead, prepare to get mauled, even if the animal eventually wanders away. Also, while your being mauled.....you still have to play dead, no screaming or fussing.

  • bronxbomber252
    bronxbomber252 Month ago

    I was impressed when you brought up the analog watch to navigate trick until you messed it up. You said halfway between the hr hand and the 12 will be true north. This is only true in the southern hemisphere. In the northern hemisphere (which has way more people) this trick will point true south.

  • Lady Justice
    Lady Justice Month ago

    If you are bit by a snake on a limb, wrap the limb in bandages to constrict, but not stop blood flow

  • Spud Gunn
    Spud Gunn Month ago

    So, point the hour hand at the sun, and half way between that and the 12 is due north, is it? WRONG! It's due south. Check your facts before you BS people, numbnuts!

  • Jason Krantz
    Jason Krantz Month ago

    "die with some fucking dignity" lololol

  • WolfbloodWarrior Games

    3:07 or if you know it is early in the day or late look at the sun if it’s early the sun will be in the east if it is late it will be in the west

  • Vertical_Leap32
    Vertical_Leap32 Month ago

    You gotta KICK the shark in the face. Have you ever been kicked in the face? It doesn't taste good, the shark will know this immediately.

  • Hungry Ninja
    Hungry Ninja Month ago

    Easy Peasy Harry Fucked A Weasley

  • Alex Lee
    Alex Lee Month ago


  • Elias Wesbrock
    Elias Wesbrock Month ago

    Playing dead would only work with black bears, or smaller bears. It would also not work against Lemon Sharks, Bull Sharks, or Tiger Sharks.

  • hotnindza
    hotnindza Month ago

    You DON'T get under the table during the earthquake! You find an object that cannot be squashed completely and lie RIGHT BESIDE it. That is called "triangle of life". Imagine large chunk of concrete falling - if it falls on sofa, it will squash it somewhat, one end of the concrete block will be on the sofa at some height, and the other one will be touching the ground, forming the "slope". Just below that slope, right beside the sofa is the "triangle" where you have most chances to stay alive. If that block falls on the table, and you are underneath, you are a pancake. Good objects to find are sofas, couches, large piles of paper, cars, sturdy furniture, the things that cannot be squashed completely. NO table is that good.

  • Steffi S
    Steffi S Month ago

    Playing dead does not work on a shark. They can sense your heartbeat, your muscle movements, your electric field ... He will probably think that you are sleeping at best :D

  • Banderas Vaduva
    Banderas Vaduva Month ago

    *_”Die with some fu**ing dignity”_*

  • Ofbaserion
    Ofbaserion Month ago

    iPhones aren't the only phones, in fact the worst phones.

  • Clint Box
    Clint Box Month ago

    I didn't see it in the video clip, but worth mentioning that you should never run in zigzags from an alligator or a crocodile. They aren't likely to run far after you so it's best to just run your ass off in a straight-line. Otherwise, you're just getting eaten, but delaying their lunch a little longer.

  • Yeti Enigma
    Yeti Enigma Month ago

    Snake venom is made of Protein. So you could suck out the venom as long as you didn't have any stomach ulsers.

  • Carter Feeler
    Carter Feeler Month ago

    Yeah, but wouldn’t it be harder to reach the shark’s eyes than its nose? I’m pretty sure that if the shark is close enough for you to get to its eyes, it already has its jaws closed on you.

  • Modern Warfare - Benedict Munks MWBenedict

    Being in a falling elevator myself I wanted to highlight this myth. You and the elevator fall at the same speed, giving you superman powers where you float in the middle of the elevator. This is No jumping Or laying on the elevator floor.

  • Edwin Ndirangu
    Edwin Ndirangu Month ago

    Die with some fuckn dignity

  • The_ Zee
    The_ Zee Month ago

    If you ever get attacked by a shark your supposed to flip it so it temporally hibernates just ask scientist

  • Sovereign Snorlax
    Sovereign Snorlax 2 months ago

    How uh... how do you keep your pulse low exactly?

  • SiriusMined
    SiriusMined 2 months ago

    To critique these tips, you actually have to quote the tip correctly. The thing about moss wasn't that Moss only grows on one side, it's that it grows thicker on one side.

  • Emma SpAce
    Emma SpAce 2 months ago

    I'm so glad people are exposing the moss thing, I went outside into the "brush" I guess (it wasn't quite a forest) and looked at a tree. And second grade me was outraged at the blatant lies being told! Then I walked out and got on the bus.

  • TheSaviorOfSouls
    TheSaviorOfSouls 2 months ago

    Been bit by a shark, play dead, drown, be dead.

  • MagmaXcrossXfist
    MagmaXcrossXfist 2 months ago +1

    Well there actually was one guy who got attacked by a shark, punched it in the nose and it did work, the shark swam off: www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2017/11/14/british-doctor-saves-himslef-punching-shark-surfing-attack-australia/

  • jambalie
    jambalie 2 months ago

    I am not someone who says there are things you can't joke about, but that Bill Cosby joke was not ok.

  • Scott Ryan
    Scott Ryan 2 months ago

    Half of these new tips are more dangerous than the original bad tips.this is somewhat dismaying cuz I really wanted to like this channel. Okay trying to hit a shark in the face when you're being attacked by it is the only thing you could possibly do. The shark is attacking you, playing dead will not help.
    Lying down in an elevator that is falling would not help you one bit.
    mind you neither would jumping, so you're screwed either way.
    An AED "automatic electronic defibrillator" is designed specifically to jump start the heart. what you suggest is truly dangerous. if someone has a heartbeat, even if it's irregular they do not necessarily need a defibrillator. If you are a joke channel just do jokes. if you're going to dispel misconceptions do more research.

    • Scott Ryan
      Scott Ryan 2 months ago

      +Cluckery Duckery No my internet friend, I'm just making a fun story.

    • Cluckery Duckery
      Cluckery Duckery 2 months ago

      Scott Ryan wait, you're claiming this actually happened? Link to the news story.

    • Scott Ryan
      Scott Ryan 2 months ago

      +Cluckery Duckery it is your head that can't take the impact. The concussion would kill you. Any part of you is better to hit the ground before your head.
      but if this isn't ridiculous enough already. I think the best thing to do is try and grab onto something high in the elevator so the first impact can be broken by your arms, ya they'll break, then the second impact will be your legs hitting the ground. hopefully you diffused the fall enough to live.Sadly my friends around me who chose to lie down had all their brains smushed out on the floor. 😑

    • Cluckery Duckery
      Cluckery Duckery 2 months ago

      Scott Ryan lying down as flat as possible in a falling elevator absolutely would make a difference. It's simple physics. Try to spread the impact of the over as much surface area of your body as possible. It could make the difference between just breaking lots of bones or dying.

  • gochanging
    gochanging 2 months ago +1

    At 2:57, the halfway point between sun and twelve is due SOUTH - unless you are in the "southern hemisphere" (like the equator in January).
    Test advice before you need it.

  • Denizen _
    Denizen _ 3 months ago

    I thought it was to stop them biting their tongue not swallowing it, or choking on it

  • Joseph Forest
    Joseph Forest 3 months ago

    Gerald with the remote , on the sofa.

  • K ris
    K ris 3 months ago

    Makes sense why we rarely hear about slavs in Adidas track suits hit by lightning

  • Miles Janlo
    Miles Janlo 3 months ago

    Playing dead won't work with sharks either

  • Maladjusted Maverick
    Maladjusted Maverick 3 months ago

    No, if you're attacked by a shark, you should go for the eyes. Playing dead won't work. www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/how-to-survive-the-shark-attack-that-is-never-going-to-happen-to-you-24121725/
    Also, if you're friend is suffering from hypothermia, definitely DO NOT let them go to sleep.

  • Sarah Berkner
    Sarah Berkner 3 months ago

    Thanks for the informative video but all the bleeping was distracting- if you realize you don't need profanity to make a good video then you don't need lots of "bleeps" either. Also you're not supposed to go to sleep on a concussion and as for a seizure, you should try to turn them on their side so they don't choke on their tongue. A girl in my Biology class had a seizure and of course the Biology teacher knew what to do (fortunately).

  • Waldo Nowaldo
    Waldo Nowaldo 3 months ago

    With almost any large predator, including sharks and carnivorous cats, the best strategy is to get behind the beast as quickly as you can and insert a finger or better a thumb! into its anus.
    This will completely immobilize it and halt the attack.
    Your problem of course comes next, as you cannot remove the finger/thumb until help arrives
    or the predator falls asleep or passes out from starvation.
    But this tip could certainly save your life or prevent serious injury ...

  • Stephen Mackey
    Stephen Mackey 3 months ago

    Great Outdoors with lighting

  • R S
    R S 3 months ago

    *ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!* You should NOT play dead when fighting a shark! That's probably the stupidest thing to do. For sharks, a dead human is much better. Sharks can smell blood from many miles away and they will like it more if their prey is dead. They are suggesting a survival tip that will 100% get you killed

  • Welshie Ranger
    Welshie Ranger 3 months ago


  • •Scf
    •Scf 3 months ago

    if you play dead against a shark then you'll get eaten up and die.

  • Xandrieth Xs
    Xandrieth Xs 3 months ago

    'Die with some dignity".... XD

  • Marina centa
    Marina centa 3 months ago

    I read about a man who was stranded at sea without water who ate jellyfish. He claimed it helped, and he stayed alive for 4 days. Haven't seen it verified though.

    OOF NEATER 3 months ago


  • Mathyu Ryan
    Mathyu Ryan 3 months ago

    But it's sterile and I like the taste.

  • sadra bathaei
    sadra bathaei 3 months ago

    Harry fucked a weasley

  • Krawczon
    Krawczon 3 months ago

    Yes... Slav Squat

  • Gideon Kalve Jarvis
    Gideon Kalve Jarvis 3 months ago

    The one time I was in an accident, the nice older woman sitting in the front seat (she and her husband were kind enough to give me a ride home from our church meeting) was going into shock after we hit a car (T-boned) that failed to stop at a stop sign. As I was in the back, I got off with relatively minor injuries, and could help the first good Samaritan who stopped and got me out so we could carry her out...only to discover that she'd had heart surgery rather recently - her scars and such were still quite fresh. Interesting how your mind gets very clear in these adrenaline-packed situations, because all the first aid training I'd had in various classes came back immediately and in crystal clear definition: elevate the legs, keep the patient warm and as comfortable as the present miserable situation allows, talk to the patient and keep her calm, and don't, under any circumstances, let her fall asleep, because she probably won't wake up.
    To remove the suspense, the nice old lady and her husband both lived and recovered quite well - miraculously, honestly, but that's another story. This video, however, made me look up that last piece of advice, the part about keeping people awake when they're injured and going into shock. As it turns out, according to WebMD and other online sources, my classes were wrong (outdated information, like providing mouth-to-mouth as part of resuscitation) and this video is mostly right, but the practice is still a good idea.
    Keeping someone awake, according to these sources, won't affect whether they live or die, but on the other hand, it makes it much easier to tell if the person is getting worse, because you can talk to them and ask. If they pass out (and the dear old woman did repeatedly tell me she wanted to go to sleep, while I was staring at the pale blue scar tissue and visible staples beneath her skin exposed by torn clothing, and definitely not feeling anywhere as calm and confident as I desperately tried to seem to help calm her down), then that in itself is generally a symptom that they're getting worse. In the situation I experienced, actually letting my elderly friend go to sleep might have helped matters, because it would probably have allowed her to relax more fully, countering the shock she was entering when I started working to calm her down. On the other hand, seeing her conscious when she entered the ambulance after the EMTs arrived did wonders for her husband's morale.

  • HerRoyalBlondeness
    HerRoyalBlondeness 3 months ago

    “I’m having a seizure! Put a wallet in my mouth!”

  • Joseph Izzo
    Joseph Izzo 3 months ago

    In addition to collapsing the freeway, if by some miracle it didn’t collapse, the wind actually accelerates as it passes under. This means a 250 mile an hour wind will increase to over 300, tearing you from under the cover of falling concrete and flinging you around and into the other people who are also flying hundreds of yards away from the totally destroyed overpass.
    Good news: you weren’t crushed
    Bad news: your flesh was sand blasted from your body before you died. Yeah, that qualifies as bad news I think.

  • Jared Kula
    Jared Kula 3 months ago

    Who else watching this is in the Zeit-Gang?

  • pete lee
    pete lee 3 months ago

    7:44 actually if you found someone dying(assuming you didn't witness the event) it would be in your best interest to make sure he/she stays conscious so that the peramedics can find out what happened

  • Jo-anna F
    Jo-anna F 3 months ago

    I disagree with the snake bite one cause he said do you want your friend to poison himself and snakes release venom not poison and venom only effects your blood stream while poison can be taken through bloodstream or orally

  • wasup23tube
    wasup23tube 3 months ago

    getting hit with lightning does more damage the less surface area you have, ive never actually heard to lay down, but that is better then minimizing the surface that gets hit with lightening. the same voltage is there, the same current will happen. decreasing the surface area is the same as having a smaller wire. it gets hot

  • Stephen Hopkins
    Stephen Hopkins 3 months ago

    If you have a thumb then find the shark's bung hole. They hate that ... so I hear.

  • Grandmaster Hash
    Grandmaster Hash 3 months ago

    Dat was a good Cosby joke, my nigga. It made me... CRACK up!

  • Chris Mel
    Chris Mel 3 months ago

    Don't White Aharks eat dead things like whales? I just watched a video of white sharks taking chunks out of this dead whale carcass.

  • Generous G
    Generous G 3 months ago

    Has an elevator ever went free falling with people in it?

  • Mick Thornton
    Mick Thornton 3 months ago

    Holy S*#%, the Bill Cosby in the Temple hoodie picture surprised me and then made me laugh out loud at work. Thanks for going there.

  • A Random Bird
    A Random Bird 3 months ago

    You ever punch a shark

  • Isaac Tallent
    Isaac Tallent 3 months ago

    Bro what?

  • Jacob Adams
    Jacob Adams 3 months ago

    Played water polo for 12 years, so yes I am VERY confident in my “swim punches”. Not hit a shark level confident, but still... screw you

  • azraelbatosi
    azraelbatosi 3 months ago

    I had an epileptic friend, he had a seizure and we stuck a leather belt between his teeth...because last time he’d had a bad seizure he almost bit his tongue in two and bled to death...movies might give just AWFUL medical advice but come on Cracked....although a wooden spoon would probably result in broken teeth and a wallet could impede breath, so...ok...but still

  • Reo Rose
    Reo Rose 3 months ago

    You look like a male Ariana grande

  • Miracleous Owens
    Miracleous Owens 3 months ago

    Play dead with a shark, I've seen documentaries of them eating giant whale carcasses, you think they won't attempt to eat you or take care bite out of you because you're "dead". If anything, anyone who tries this in real life with any predatory animal may survive with this possibly. But remember in my opinion there are only two reasons why a predator won't eat a dead body either something bigger is already eating it, or it's too rotten to eat ( unless your a hyena or vulture), and I'm pretty sure these instances nullify playing dead.

  • Paul is a person
    Paul is a person 3 months ago

    How did you miss this joke!

  • Derek Beyer
    Derek Beyer 3 months ago

    The whole keeping someone awake thing stems from unusual fatigue being a strong sign of a head injury, along with you know, cause to suspect a head injury. The bullet thing is even dumber then this video says because alot of bullets fragments when they hit their target. especially if it catches bone or hard cartilage. 5.56, due to its extremely high velocity and generally light weight, is notorious for this. Thats what makes it so effective. Even some of the best hollow points on the market right now in terms of weight retained and how effectively they open (Federal Ammunitions HST's have time and time again demonstrated this) There is still gonna be some metal that comes off and stays in your body. let a surgeon remove the bullet. The biggest reason not to jam some shit into the mouth of a person having a seizure is you are obstructing the airway. The best thing to do is roll them on their side. Finally, Im not gonna go seek out a fight with a shark, because im not a fucking idiot. but if a shark comes at me ready to fucking EAT ME. Im punching something best I can.

  • Your Boi
    Your Boi 3 months ago

    If you play dead a shark will still eat you

  • Clara Goncalves
    Clara Goncalves 3 months ago

    The lightning one, if you are on an open field the best thing is to lay down. The electricity tends to reach the highest point on the surface, and if you are standing or crouching (like he said) on something like a football camp, you have more chance to be hit. With that i say, depending where you are ground level is the way to go on a storm.

  • Chuy Torres
    Chuy Torres 3 months ago

    Die with some fucking dignity, also a cup + plastic= drinking water

  • Christopher Thompson
    Christopher Thompson 3 months ago

    Playing dead in a shark attack will get you eaten alive. Sharks are scavengers they eat dead things. Most shark attacks happen when people are being still. This is the absolute worst advice you can give.

  • Matthew Giese
    Matthew Giese 3 months ago

    I had lightning strike nearby me when I was getting out of a car. It hit a Transformer 70 feet away from me. The sound and boom was noticeable and you involuntarily react to... yet in movies they just stand there like nothing happened. I actually felt the sonic wave hit me and I was mostly in my car and only had one foot on the ground.

  • king Eclipso
    king Eclipso 3 months ago

    oh flip i have samsung im f***ed

  • Don Beeson
    Don Beeson 3 months ago

    Do not lay down in an elevator! Your brain or heart are more likely to become dislodged and kill you if you make direct contact. Protect your f** brain! Assume standard static line parachute fall position. feet and knees together knees slightly bent. chin down, elbows in. Of course you are going to shatter basically everything in your lower body but quite frankly, all the good bits that keep your body running are upstairs, see brain and heart. Of course there is also a point where the chances of survival are so small it becomes a pissing contest but laying flat on your back will not improve your chances of survival, it will simply spread your brains across the inside of that elevator. Feet and knees together, always feet first. Don't just spout shit off because it sounds like it could be right. Source: I'm a parachutist, emergency parachute instructor, and survival instructor for the military.

  • Kava Kahn
    Kava Kahn 3 months ago

    When your only source of water is the ocean, you want to boil some ocean water, hold a dry rag over the steam, and then wring out the accumulated water into a cup.

  • mark_lifts_things
    mark_lifts_things 4 months ago

    When using a watch as a compass, halfway between the hour hand pointed at the sun and 12 is *south*, not north. Video is wrong.

  • Vandy 004
    Vandy 004 4 months ago

    Venom, not poison...

  • Marek Bartoš
    Marek Bartoš 4 months ago

    GOLD 🤣

  • Sarah says hello
    Sarah says hello 4 months ago

    Thankfully the chance if shark attack to you is stupid low.

  • YouTube Algorithm
    YouTube Algorithm 4 months ago

    Playing dead would just make an easy meal for sharks.