6 Popular Survival Tips That Will Get You Killed


Comments • 2 311

  • Andraž Guzaj
    Andraž Guzaj Day ago

    Heh, easy peasy, Harry f*cked a Weasley... good line 👍

  • Tegan WR
    Tegan WR 5 days ago

    I live in our house was built over 100 years and it’s Adobe!! 😱 do you only problem is we like never get tornados 🌪

  • Charity Ava
    Charity Ava 6 days ago

    Fake news! It's not a "compound" it's a bunker! Gawd, idiot! And we don't wear tin foil hats cause aluminum poisoning. Get your facts straight sheeple! 🐑😈🐏

  • brian bleichner
    brian bleichner 8 days ago

    2:21 was hilarious

  • Lunar Phantom
    Lunar Phantom 8 days ago

    I've never heard/seen people do/put stuff in their or other people's mouths during a seizure

  • Cody Herio
    Cody Herio 11 days ago

    sharks dont care if you play dead. In fact they think free meal...

  • Idun Rudemo
    Idun Rudemo 17 days ago

    Waaaaaiiit, are you and Daniel related?

  • Sunny D
    Sunny D 22 days ago

    I’ve been laughing my ass off throughout this whole video

  • Terrance Toole
    Terrance Toole 23 days ago

    surprisingly ...there is alot of wrong or not thoroughly explained information on this vid. Usually cracked vids are ok but this one is irresponsibly wrong on several points

  • Tessie Gesch
    Tessie Gesch 25 days ago

    I don’t have confidence in anything I do or anything about me so yay

  • Asbestos Fish
    Asbestos Fish 26 days ago

    Actually, it’s a good idea to let someone with an injury go to sleep. Because their heart rate slows down while unconscious (less bleeding) and _they aren’t going to go into shock._

  • EDN & HFJ
    EDN & HFJ 26 days ago

    Playing dead would not be simple, sharks see it as a free meal

  • Tiffany ONeal
    Tiffany ONeal 27 days ago

    For someone who lived in tornado alley I’ve never seen a tornado.

  • Mr. Snorlax TV
    Mr. Snorlax TV 29 days ago

    When you get stabbed and the knife is inside of you, don't take it out.
    If you leave it in, less blood will come out.

  • Tanning Chatum
    Tanning Chatum 29 days ago

    Only Angelina Jolie can punch a shark

  • Pavla D
    Pavla D 29 days ago

    *Easy peasy Harry fucked a Weasley*

  • Liza Tanzawa
    Liza Tanzawa Month ago

    An overpass also funnels and concentrates high winds, will blow your car away

  • Paul Saxon
    Paul Saxon Month ago

    Sometimes they like to act like they know what they're talking about just because.
    Case in point, go lay in a ditch during a tornado. Tornados can make sticks fly like bullets and can throw cars like they can throw sticks. In the off chance you can survive it's going to be by having the wind go over you. Like a makeshift basement. Then you can have a 2% chance if surviving instead of a .0000002% chance of surviving.

  • Pasito Lizarko
    Pasito Lizarko Month ago

    The biting seizure technique is so they don't bite their tongues

  • Walter Brigges
    Walter Brigges Month ago

    Everyone in this freaking comment section are geniuses you should definitely listen to them

  • Black Bear33
    Black Bear33 Month ago

    If You drink piss You will puke out more water than You gain.

  • Nathan Hurst
    Nathan Hurst Month ago

    You sound like a pussy retard.

  • Monae Smith
    Monae Smith Month ago

    Him : “Harry Bleep* Weasley”
    Me : Harry Potter** Ron Weasley**

  • Vrushalee Mayekar
    Vrushalee Mayekar Month ago

    You shove spoon or a rolled handkerchief in the mouth of a person who is having a seizure so they don't bite their tongue. My dad almost bit a part off his tongue when he was having a seizure. Don't give dim witted advice.

  • Archer
    Archer Month ago

    I mean Steve o from jackass kicked a shark in the nose and he swam tf off. So idk maybe you just gotta get lucky 😂.

  • Barbora Urbankova
    Barbora Urbankova Month ago

    Doorways ARE a good place to stand during an earthquake. But they have to be the European brick load-bearing ones.
    American doorways are paper wafers attached to sticks with kid's glue

  • Gretchen Ross
    Gretchen Ross Month ago

    Um, yeah nah mate.. 2 aussie surfers have saved themselves by biffing sharks on the snoz.. Mick Fanning and Charlie Fry (a surfer at Avoca beach NSW)

    ..but i wouldn't go starting fist fights with sharks.

  • Stephanie West
    Stephanie West Month ago

    I've lived in Kansas for pretty much all of my life and have never heard the one about opening the windows during a tornado.

  • palmchika13 Mary charry

    well my great aunt died by choking on her tongue says the doctor or probably he killed her and made up a lie???


    You’d think as someone living in tornado alley I might’ve heard that one about opening a door or window but then again, maybe that has something to do with why I haven’t.. When faced with a threat, we’ve always stayed away from windows and migrated to the middle of the house or the bathroom. (You learn how to make bathtubs comfy real quick lmao)

  • Cheshired Grin
    Cheshired Grin Month ago

    Check for a soccer game where lightning hit the ground and hurt all the players....google it, shows the ripple effect you describe.

  • Jeramee Quicksill
    Jeramee Quicksill Month ago +3

    So if I get attacked by a shark, the best tactic is to play dead and become a ragdoll? Sounds legit. Considering sharks usually go for injured or dead animals to begin with.

  • BeautifulPollution
    BeautifulPollution Month ago

    Harry fucked a weasley.. lol

  • Medical Psychology of WI

    DJ C is correct. In the hospital, we consider this "swallowing your tongue". You can argue it may not be the correct terminology to use, but the point is it's absolutely possible to choke on your tongue. And, if you're ever around a person who is - you can save their life by simply pulling back their tongue with your middle (longest) finger.

  • christopherscottb
    christopherscottb Month ago

    My good friend calls his place a "compound," but it's ironic. Least I'm pretty sure. He is kinda weird.

  • Blue Mage
    Blue Mage Month ago

    The odds of an elevator falling are astronomically low. They are suspended by multiple steel cords that can hold a full capacity elevator on it's own

  • DenaL112
    DenaL112 Month ago

    As an epileptic thank you for telling them about not sticking something in a person's mouth. No, I won't swallow my tongue nor am I going to choke on it but I will bite the crap out of it but I will be fine. Keep your utensils out of my mouth. P.S. Choking involves the airways not the tongue.

  • Bethany O'Neal
    Bethany O'Neal Month ago

    But if your house is a really big, wouldn’t it be a compound?

  • Joseph Bentley
    Joseph Bentley Month ago

    Doesn't really matter you can't see lightning strike anyway.

  • Scott Hall
    Scott Hall Month ago

    DO NOT PLAY DEAD for a blackbear you will be eaten they unlike the grizzly aren't chasing a threat they want the easiest meal possible so fighting back will make you less desirable as a meal. Same thing goes for scavenger sharks like white tips or tigers, the best defense against animal attacks is knowing what you're dealing with specifically.

  • Paige 1996
    Paige 1996 Month ago

    You can’t swallow your tongue but you sure can bite it off. Gosh you’re so annoying lol

  • Lyle Ordway
    Lyle Ordway Month ago

    Under certain conditions, you would actually want to eat snow. It can rob your body of even more heat if you spend a ton of time trying to light a fire. Yes it can affect you in the long run but if youre facing severe dehydration, youll live longer if yoou eat a bit of snow

  • Phi6er
    Phi6er Month ago

    Defibrillators don't "restart the heart". They are instead used for de-fibrillation. Shocking, I know.

  • chris topher
    chris topher Month ago

    Lead bullets can give you lead poisoning so it probably should be removed

  • KG tekkerz
    KG tekkerz 2 months ago

    playing dead won't work for sharks they'll any fresh meat

  • Sef Iscool
    Sef Iscool 2 months ago

    Also per is super salty and can actually dehydrate you.

  • R3Aper exe
    R3Aper exe 2 months ago

    Actually playing dead doesn't entirely work on black bears either because they'll still eat you. Brown bears and about half of the other predators will leave you alone based on if they're looking for food or just protecting territory

  • aprill Taylor
    aprill Taylor 2 months ago

    "Electricitied up your body" best description ever!

  • Ky Peppar
    Ky Peppar 2 months ago

    *Bout to do coke* Like the coke heads you are! Lmao

  • Luis Cunha
    Luis Cunha 2 months ago

    Here is the comment :D. Well done.

  • GoodKnight5252
    GoodKnight5252 2 months ago

    Actually :)
    Don't let your patient fall asleep so you can see his awareness.. AVPU

  • Christopher Melvin
    Christopher Melvin 2 months ago

    Good advice about the plummeting elevators. ...except all modern elevators have a ratcheting failsafe in them to prevent exactly that.

  • DaylightDigital
    DaylightDigital 2 months ago

    Miss the old Cracked days, things were so much simpler then...

  • Priscilla Wilson
    Priscilla Wilson 2 months ago

    "Old wives' tales", ctpb, are CORRECT. Old wives KNOW.

  • Rainia Ananda
    Rainia Ananda 2 months ago

    HOLY SHIT YOU'RE GETTING PEOPLE KILLED WITH THIS ADVICE!! The watch/sun trick ONLY works if you live in the Northern Hemisphere, meaning the other HALF of the globe you have just sent to their doom... Defibrillators DO WORK!! This is EXACTLY why they are used in hospitals AROUND THE WORLD EVERY DAY with great success! And in EMERGENCIES of life or death, please DO DRINK YOUR PEE, and for that matter FIND A CACTUS! You're an idiot if you think dying is the option over small efforts at saving your life. Of course, this last one is if life or death... your pee for a while will help, many cactus are perfectly fine, and if you choose bad advice over a possible tummy ache, boo you just died.

  • D1stant
    D1stant 2 months ago

    EMT, the don't go to sleep shit is real, we don't ask it because it will keep them alive longer, we ask it so we can communicate and monitor their condition better. It's easier to learn that they cant feel their legs (probably a severed spinal cord) from their mouth than have to go through the protocols to protect against something that already happened.

  • W3475ter Weird name probably

    But then does this video make its facts popular survival tips?

  • Jeremy Cline
    Jeremy Cline 2 months ago +1

    Rape jokes, guys? Have to downvote that shit.

  • StarGazer kawaii
    StarGazer kawaii 2 months ago

    I thought you had them bite on something to prevent them from biting off their own tongue

  • Raylean
    Raylean 2 months ago

    This man is trying to kill us if you play dead a damn shark will eat your ass

  • Harry Burgan Jr.
    Harry Burgan Jr. 2 months ago

    6:10 Wouldn't better survival advice for surviving an elevator falling at free fall be, not even trying to survive because regardless of the actual fall itself, going into shock will most likely be fatal?

  • Harry Burgan Jr.
    Harry Burgan Jr. 2 months ago

    3:56 I've never heard anyone say to do that but given the stupidity of a large percentage of the human race, it's not that hard to believe that there have been people who have advised to do that. However, I'm sure your advice will work with no basement option, but isn't covering your head in a basement with no windows, far and away the most safe thing to do besides heading to a shelter?

  • Leonard Aslarona
    Leonard Aslarona 2 months ago

    5 worst allys: #3 Ali Mills xD!!!! I died

  • piciaxel
    piciaxel 2 months ago

    in the earthquake areas it tends to be common practice to have some really sturdy and reinforced walls, so if the area you are in is likely to have earthquakes staying near a wall/in a door frame might actually save you...
    also if the table you are hiding under is in the middle of the room you might as well just stay put
    so as long as you are close to the wall you are safer
    signed a guy that grew up in a earthquake area

  • E_ M_ M :D
    E_ M_ M :D 2 months ago

    Use a tazer on a snake bite

  • j c
    j c 2 months ago

    Snakes don't poison you (there's only one species of poisonous snake which is found in the sea). Some snakes can however be venomous.

  • Me Time
    Me Time 2 months ago

    It's not to prevent someone from swallowing their tongue. It's to prevent someone from biting their tongue off.

  • Nalin Saur
    Nalin Saur 2 months ago

    On the moss one, you can just use the fact that the sun goes from East to West. If it's the morning, just find where the sun is (without looking directly at it) and that's towards the East.
    Maybe not, though. I sort of made that up, but it's logical. Moreso than north moss.

  • Evanston Conner
    Evanston Conner 2 months ago

    I know these survival tips will get you killed especially the shark one also I always have a knife when I swim in the ocean so sharks are no problem poking there eyes out

  • Grace Lozada
    Grace Lozada 2 months ago

    Maybe this video is supposed to be ironic or sarcastic, but please guys the first survival tip is to NOT take survival tips from this kind of videos, do your research, please. You should better trust your local civil protection services. And Cracked, whether you are or not trying to get people to follow these pieces of advice, shame on you, some of these tips could get people killed. Kids actually got killed last year during an earthquake in my city because videos told them to get under a table was better than exiting the building.

  • Grace Lozada
    Grace Lozada 2 months ago

    Ok, it is ironic, because in the earthquake case they are actually telling you to not follow good advise and replacing it with advise that will get you killed.
    Unless you live in a house made of wood, meaning most everyone outside the US, you SHOULD NOT use a table to protect yourself from an earthquake. Actually, the only way to protect yourself is to exit the building. But if you can't exit, you can go to the least dangerous places in case of the building collapsing, which are a door frame (there are usually reinforcements around it), near a column or beam, or to the top of the building. Also, stay away from anything electrical or any gas installations (your dryer, stove, water heater, etc.)

  • Ian Bonnar
    Ian Bonnar 2 months ago

    I'm pretty sure your not supposed to touch someone at all if their having a seizure, if you, for example, grabbed their arms, the shear strength of their convulsions could cause them to break their own arms

  • Knight And SpaceShip
    Knight And SpaceShip 2 months ago

    Another popular survival tip that will get you killed.
    *Don't* Go to college or university.

  • Michael Enoch
    Michael Enoch 2 months ago

    Play dead? You crazy son of human.I think it's you trying to get people killed. Play dead? Nah wha yu wanna du is dive headlong directly into their mouth. Du this as fass as yu can so that when it bites it only gets feet (that way yu go headlong other wise it gets yo upper body) (& yes I kno..headlong hmhm). Now that you in their mouth with your good half start ripping out is't insides. Just go to work like your life depends on it.

  • A.C. Jelly
    A.C. Jelly 2 months ago

    Defibs absolutely can be used on cardiac arrest.
    If you ever have to use an automatic defibrillator (the ones you may see in public places) the machine will do all the work and will tell you what to do and when.

  • Mike B
    Mike B 3 months ago

    This DORK is going to get people hurt or possibly killed. If I ever see him without a pulse not to use a defibrillator. Instead piss down his throat and say I thought his stomach was on fire.

  • Fish and Beans
    Fish and Beans 3 months ago

    Screw yourself

  • darrius williams
    darrius williams 3 months ago

    playing dead will get you killed as well sharks are scavengers

  • Amber Branks
    Amber Branks 3 months ago

    It's a specific type of moss y'all.

  • Amber Branks
    Amber Branks 3 months ago

    At least we know who'll go 1st.
    My compound is secure😊
    I can't find a tinfoil hat
    Www.educate yourself.org

  • Skiper Nipper
    Skiper Nipper 3 months ago

    This made me laugh so hard, thank you hahhahahahahahaha

  • Knut Masse
    Knut Masse 3 months ago

    Playing dead makes you ample prey for several sharks, chop the gills the front of the nostril or the eyes as a last resort it's painful but most sharks won't need them to track and kill you. For moss it depends on the moss and environment. Lightning is searching for ground no matter what you do do not take your shoes off or make direct contact with the ground you will boil alive. Cactus if it's clear your do not fear, foggy or colored walk away. Gunshot or knife, take your shirt off press and wrap it into your wound, dont remove anything else. Keep them awake for continuous feed back and consistent motivation of the victim, only let them sleep when your certain they are no longer a class 1. Finally and most importantly if it's safe for your hand put something in the poor fuckers mouth, you can choke on your tongue or worse and far more commonly bite a chunk out and choke on that or drown in your own blood.

  • Takunda Mwinjilo
    Takunda Mwinjilo 3 months ago

    @6:20 "It willl cause your skeleton to collapse so fast and completely gravity will scream JENGA!" lol

  • Allie Nordin
    Allie Nordin 3 months ago

    3:33 thats very rude ....

  • Adeli Sandwich
    Adeli Sandwich 3 months ago

    I dont if the ' dont annoy someone so they don't fall asleep while they're bleeding so that they stay awake' is good advice. Doesn't blood get thinner if you sleep?

  • Lucy Marshall
    Lucy Marshall 3 months ago

    As someone who used to be a lifeguard, everything about the defibrillator was wrong. Defibs will not work if there’s a heartbeat.

  • mirinae
    mirinae 3 months ago

    Good content, annyoing presentation.

  • Michael Grose
    Michael Grose 3 months ago

    how did "crime alley" not make the cut...

  • Dragunov Bushcraft
    Dragunov Bushcraft 3 months ago

    On point with nearly everything here! Bravo! However, during an earthquake, the safest place is OUTside, away from anything that can fall on you. Tables aren't strong enough to stop a collapsing roof from squashing you.
    Physics: If a roof comes down at ANY other angle, other than straight down, it will grind across the top of a table as it collapses, thus breaking the tables legs, and turning you into a meat pate' as it smears your body on the floor. Safest place is GENERALLY in your back yard, AWAY from things that can fall on you.

  • Stephen Goodman
    Stephen Goodman 3 months ago

    WRONG on the "tornadoes collapse overpasses"

  • MaziK73
    MaziK73 3 months ago

    My Grandad choked on his tongue in his sleep... he was completely off his face

  • MysticGlaceon
    MysticGlaceon 3 months ago

    "Easy peasy Harry f*cked a Weasley"

  • Bluegeckobutt
    Bluegeckobutt 3 months ago

    Snakes aren’t poisonous 😎

  • Meg
    Meg 3 months ago

    Do not fake being dead in a shark attack because sharks are scavengers and eat dead things

  • Jillian Smith
    Jillian Smith 3 months ago

    How amazing, there were more than six tips here. Especially the last one: "Die with some fucking dignity." I concur--when possible, you should always die with some fucking dignity.

  • Sir. Beanie
    Sir. Beanie 3 months ago

    Didn’t sharks eat dead people off the that one WW2 ship that the Japanese sunk? I mean they ate the live ones too

  • Moose0fNorway
    Moose0fNorway 3 months ago

    Have you actually checked out any of the things you say here? One of the most important things to do if someone is having an epileptic attack IS TO MAKE SURE THEY DON'T CHOKE ON THEIR TONGUE! If they have the attack, if you must, put your hand into their mouth and fucking drag it out.

  • Moose0fNorway
    Moose0fNorway 3 months ago

    If someone has had any sort of head injury, or any other injury where the paramedics will show up, DON'T FUCKING GO TO SLEEP.
    1: If it's a head injury, there's much information to be gained of what parts of the brain that has suffered trauma from that patient by talking to them. And they might actually get some permanent\worse traumas by falling asleep.
    2: The paramedics generally wants to talk to the patient, because no one knows better what's wrong with them better than the patient. What could you have eaten to cause the injury, what drugs have you taken, what did you touch, what bit you etc. etc.
    So no, don't fucking let that person fall asleep.

  • jack daniels
    jack daniels 3 months ago

    Not bill cosby tho 😂😂😭

  • Kiki G.
    Kiki G. 3 months ago

    Late to the party, but guess he missed the twister movie reference where they were discussing the safest practice to be struck by lightening and survive.

    • Kiki G.
      Kiki G. 3 months ago

      And bullets were recommended to be removed from the old style lead round shot causing severe issues, not the modern bullet types. Either way though, dirty hands and tools feeling around for the bullet were and are still a great thing to do if you want to get an awful wound infection.